Month: June 2024

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Rediscovering Calm: A 60-Day Meditation Journey and Its Impact on My Life

Embarking on a personal experiment, I initiated a meditation routine on April 17, 2024, marking my second attempt at incorporating meditation into my daily life. My previous endeavor was short-lived, plagued by impatience and a lack of observable benefits, which led me to prematurely abandon the practice. I have always struggled with activities that require stillness and patience, such as watching movies or simply sitting still, with my media consumption largely limited to YouTube.

Prompted by a burgeoning curiosity, I revisited meditation. The nagging thought of potentially missing out on significant benefits simply because I disliked remaining stationary was unsettling. Determined to explore the unknown possibilities of meditation, I decided to give it another earnest attempt.

Driven by widespread claims of meditation’s benefits, I set a 60-day goal for myself for this attempt, hypothesizing that a fixed timeframe might encourage persistence. I established parameters for tracking my progress, deciding to monitor my sleep quality, weight, heart rate, and daily meditation adherence via the Finch App.

As noted in my April 20 entry, I faced significant challenges in maintaining a consistent meditation practice early in the project. My grade school memories of enforced brief morning 3-minute meditation sessions, which were agonizing, seemed to haunt me. I had a habit of doing something when I was supposed to sit still and meditate, such as reading. Cunningly, I started to think about piano music in my head, which still got me in trouble on multiple occasions. My teacher often scolded me for not doing the meditation seriously back then.

As an adult, my problems from childhood persist. Thoughts, particularly daily tasks, intrusively disrupted my attempts at mental clarity. I had to get rid of the garbage of my thoughts. Data analysts often use the word GIGO (Garbage in, garbage out.) I decided to purge my thoughts before I started meditation. I strategized around this by scheduling meditation after morning journaling and daily planning, which improved my focus on physical sensations like body temperature and breathing patterns. However, I often struggled to sustain attention during the sessions, which typically lasted between 5 and 15 minutes in the mornings and 10 to 20 minutes at night.

Mondays proved particularly difficult due to early work commutes and abbreviated morning routines. In the bigging, I woke up at 5:15 am, 15 minutes earlier, to do all my morning routines, including this meditation. Now, I had difficulty concentrating because my time was too tight. On such days, I managed only five minutes of meditation in the morning, compensating with a slightly longer session in the evening.

Over time, I observed an interesting shift in my mental processes during meditation. Although I still doubted the correctness of my technique, I began to experience moments of detached awareness, where my frustrations and concerns appeared as if belonging to someone else, akin to watching a movie of my own thoughts. This experience may last for a few minutes – I think. I was too worried to get out of this experience, so I hesitated to open my eyes. This new perspective, emerging sporadically, was fascinating.

I saw some changes in my data, which I corrected over time. Physiologically, I noted a significant reduction in my average resting heart rate, a benefit possibly augmented by general weight loss, which I also monitored throughout the experiment. My relationship with food also transformed; meditation diminished my cravings, particularly emotional eating, which I had abstained entirely from since starting the practice. This change, coupled with increased exercise and meticulous dietary logging, contributed to a weight loss of 5 pounds in May. However, the hot weather also played a role in this by increasing water loss.

Regarding my sleep, while my overall sleep quality improved by 6 points in May, with a slight increase in REM sleep durations of 5 minutes, deep sleep remained elusive. I have way too much REM sleep and less deep sleep, according to my sleep log, than I would like. So, I aspired to more deep sleep, believing it to be crucial for my well-being.

Reflecting on the potential health benefits of meditation, I turned to authoritative sources like the Harvard Medical School website, which confirmed that consistent practice could significantly lower heart rate, blood pressure, and stress levels, provided the sessions lasted at least ten minutes (Meditation Offers Significant Heart Benefits, 2023). My meditation routine, particularly the evening sessions, aligned with these recommendations, potentially explaining some of the physiological improvements I observed.

Contrary to my physical health gains, my sleep quality saw only marginal improvements; my result was inconsistent with some academic findings, such as those by Rush et al. (2019), which questioned the impact of meditation on sleep after analyzing metadata consisting of 3,303 total records and 18 trials from 1654 participants. Their research suggested that while some immediate benefits might be noticeable, they could not see the effect on sleep quality from mindful meditation intervention (p.7).

As my 60-day trial concludes in 10 days, I remained committed to continuing meditation beyond this initial period. Despite the challenges and ongoing uncertainties about the ‘correctness’ of my technique, the general sense of well-being it imparts is undeniable. Moreover, having not missed a single day of meditation throughout the trial is a personal achievement that motivates me to maintain and refine my practice.

In summary, while the empirical benefits of meditation, particularly concerning sleep quality, remain a topic of some debate, the personal gains in terms of stress management, heart health, and overall well-being are compelling. As I look forward to continuing my meditation journey, I am curious and hopeful about the deeper insights and health benefits a sustained practice might unlock.

References

Meditation offers significant heart benefits. (2023, August 1). Harvard Health. https://www.health.harvard.edu/heart-health/meditation-offers-significant-heart-benefits

Rusch, H. L., Rosario, M., Levison, L. M., Olivera, A., Livingston, W. S., Wu, T., & Gill, J. M. (2019). The effect of mindfulness meditation on sleep quality: A systematic review and meta-analysis of randomized controlled trials. Annals of the New York Academy of Sciences, 1445(1), 5–16. https://doi.org/10.1111/nyas.13996

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The Delicate Balance of Post-Vacation Tasks: A Personal Take

Written 5/7

Hello Dear Readers,

Returning from vacation often brings a mixed bag of emotions. The joy of experiencing new places and creating memories with loved ones is invariably tinged with the inevitable return to the mundane tasks of daily life. As I find myself back home, the reality of several pending tasks swiftly pulls me from my holiday high back to the ground.

Today, my to-do list is longer than usual, brimming with those small yet pesky tasks I’ve postponed. These tasks, while minor, have a way of accumulating, especially after a vacation when we’ve been busier than ever. Thankfully, these tasks haven’t escalated to critical levels yet, but it’s only a matter of time. With this looming deadline, I’ve resolved to tackle them head-on before they grow into urgent problems.

Unlike my wife, who meticulously documents every task in her notes, I tend to keep a mental checklist. She intersperses these tasks between her larger projects, methodically working through her list. In contrast, my approach is to elevate the urgency of these tasks, as I did yesterday, to barrel through them with momentum fueled by a self-imposed sense of urgency. This method differs from my wife’s more systematic strategy but suits my style better.

Despite their small scale, these tasks are significant enough to eat into my leisure time. However, the prospect of clearing them off my mental slate is appealing. It promises a return to tranquility, free from the nagging reminders of unfinished business lurking in my mind.

The beauty of handling these post-vacation tasks lies in the subtle balance between urgency and importance. Some tasks require minimal mental effort, which allows me to multitask effectively. I often find myself listening to an audiobook while sorting through these tasks. This not only makes the process less tedious but also somewhat enjoyable. It’s a clever way to blend productivity with leisure, turning a potentially dull routine into an enriching experience.

Handling these tasks also involves a shift in mindset. On days like today, when the list seems daunting, I adjust the importance I attach to these tasks. By mentally categorizing them as more critical, I create a sense of urgency that helps me push through them quickly. This psychological trick not only accelerates my progress but also enhances my focus.

Moreover, my approach to task management reflects a broader philosophy of life: adaptability. While my wife’s methodical approach has merits, my approach’s flexibility allows me to adjust as needed, responding to the demands of the moment without becoming entrenched in a rigid system. It’s about finding what works best on a personal level and leveraging it to maintain productivity and balance.

Ultimately, the goal is to catch up on these minor yet necessary maintenance tasks. Completing them not only clears the physical space around us but also declutters our minds. It’s about restoring order and making room for new experiences without the overhead of unresolved chores.

As I continue my day, ticking tasks off my mental list, I’m reminded of the importance of staying on top of these small responsibilities. They might not be the most thrilling part of my day, but strategically managing them ensures these tiny tasks don’t accumulate into a daunting backlog. It’s a crucial part of maintaining my physical space and mental peace, allowing me to fully enjoy the relaxation after all the work is done.

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A Day Full of Strawberries and Tofu: Adventures in Homemade Delights

Written 5/4

Hello Dear Readers,

This morning, our usual routine took a delightful detour. Here in Nashville, Tennessee, we’re smack in the middle of strawberry season—a time my wife and I eagerly anticipate each year. Bright and early, we set out to our local farmer’s market to acquire strawberries to make homemade jelly.

My wife is particularly fond of strawberries, which are directly from local farmers. She swears they are infinitely sweeter than those found in supermarket aisles. We usually purchase them by the gallon bucket, necessitating immediate action to freeze or preserve them to avoid spoilage. Although we typically manage to get two buckets, today, we restrained ourselves to just one, as our freezer is already brimming.

Part of today’s agenda for my wife was to embark on a new culinary project—making tofu. She’s planning to document this endeavor on her blog. I encourage anyone interested in DIY soybean crafts to look at her upcoming post. 

In preparation, she picked up jalapeno peppers to add a zesty twist to our strawberry jam, turning it into a spicy concoction. The preparations for this fiery strawberry jam began last night, ensuring we were all set for today’s jam-making session.

In addition to the strawberries, we also acquired soybeans for our first attempt at making tofu. My wife has spent considerable time researching tofu preparation, and her excitement was palpable—akin to her enthusiasm when we first experimented with making Kombucha at home. She procured an impressive 50 pounds of soybeans, planning to hone her tofu-making skills through ample practice.

The day’s unusual events pushed back my journal writing schedule considerably. Part of me even toyed with skipping my journal entry entirely. Still, eventually, I carved out a slot in my day to maintain this important personal ritual.

Today has been a testament to the joys of embracing local produce and the rewarding challenge of homemade food projects. Whether it’s the sweet burst of locally sourced strawberries or the intricate process of tofu making, each activity adds a unique flavor to our lives, enriching our daily routine with new textures and tastes.

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A Night of Forgotten Steps: An Encounter with Sleepwalking

Written 5/2

Hello Dear Readers,

Last evening unfolded with a most unusual occurrence. As usual, I retired for the night at our standard bedtime. The evening routine was methodical, almost mechanical, in its execution—a necessary ritual since the stroke that urged a restructuring of my daily habits. But at 2:00 AM, I awoke to find myself standing in our bathroom, bewildered and piecing together fragments of memory that suggested I had been elsewhere in the house mere moments ago.

The sensation was disorienting. Had I neglected my bedtime rituals? The usual checklist ran through my mind in a haze. Did I remember to brush my teeth? A rush of confusion overwhelmed me as though a veil had been draped over my memories. Soon, a small but significant discovery alleviated one of my concerns: I was wearing my mouthguard. This small cue hinted at the likelihood that I had completed at least part of my nightly regimen.

This practice of linking tasks, a method instilled by my occupational therapist post-stroke, has been a lifeline. It involves a simple chain of nighttime preparations: laying out sleepwear, setting aside clothes for the following day, brushing teeth, and finally, the mouthguard. Each step is meticulously planned to ensure everything is remembered.

However, the mystery deepened as I questioned whether I had managed other essential evening tasks. Had I taken my medication? Was the programmable coffee pot set for the morning? Driven by a need for reassurance, I checked both. They were in order, to my relief, yet this brought little comfort against the nagging confusion that clouded my mind.

In my semi-awake state, I grappled with two possibilities. First, I had been sleepwalking, wandering about the house in a nocturnal haze until a flicker of awareness returned in the bathroom. The alternative was perhaps even more bizarre—a vivid dream in which I moved through familiar spaces in our home, only to awaken when I reached the bathroom.

Each theory seemed plausible yet left much unexplained. As I slipped back into bed, careful not to disturb my sleeping wife, the strangeness of the night’s events hung heavily in the air. The experience was perplexing, to say the least. I lay there, a mix of concern and curiosity stirring within, pondering the depths of the human mind and its mysterious workings during the hours meant for rest.

Regardless of the proper explanation, the event poignantly reminded me of the complexities introduced by my health condition. The mechanisms I had put in place to safeguard against forgetfulness had held up. Yet, the unexpected venture into the night showed that surprises lurk even in well-planned routines.

As dawn approached, with the first hints of morning light filtering through our curtains, I found solace in the normalcy that daylight brought. Yet, the night’s journey left a lasting impression, a reminder of the delicate balance we maintain as we navigate the challenges that life and health cast in our path.

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Reflecting on “Thirteen Reasons Why”: A Novel’s Impact on Teen Issues

In the United States, a number of books have been challenged or banned in schools and libraries. Among these, “Thirteen Reasons Why” by Jay Asher caught my attention when I saw it on a list of 100 banned books. I chose this book not for any specific reason but because it was readily available.

The story begins with a high school student, Clay Jensen, receiving a mysterious package. Inside, he finds several tapes recorded by his deceased classmate, Hanna Baker. The tapes reveal thirteen reasons why she decided to end her life, and each tape is dedicated to a different person who contributed to her decision. Clay follows a map Hanna left behind as he listens to the tapes, uncovering his peers’ often painful actions and choices.

Throughout the book, issues such as betrayal, bullying, underage drinking, and sexual assault are explored. These topics start with a rumor about Hanna that spirals out of control, impacting her profoundly. Despite her attempts to seek help, the lack of adequate support reaches a breaking point for her.

Clay’s tape does not accuse him of harming her. Instead, Hanna wanted to share her feelings with him because he genuinely cared for her. This part of the book made me ponder whether I could have been as supportive as Clay tried to be, especially if I faced rejection. In the end, Clay hesitated to help her after the rejection – which I could not really blame him.

“Thirteen Reasons Why” was one of the top ten most challenged books in 2012, primarily because of its raw depiction of sensitive issues like teen suicide and bullying, which some thought inappropriate for young readers (Gomez, 2018). These concerns led to its removal from some school libraries and even bans in certain districts.

Despite having yet to experience high school in the U.S., the book paints a realistic picture of teens’ pressures and challenges. It might resonate with many young readers who see aspects of their own lives reflected in Hanna’s story.

As I read, things might have been different for Hanna if the adults around her had offered better guidance. Her parents’ constant arguing and the ineffective advice from her school counselor added to her sense of isolation. Those thoughts made me question why more supportive measures, like counseling helplines and better communication, were not available to her.

The book is undeniably provocative and presents an opportunity to address the real issues it raises. Research indicates these problems are widespread, with studies showing that bullying, drug addiction, and alcohol issues are major concerns among teens. Additionally, over 20% of teens have considered suicide (Pappas, 2023), highlighting our lack of infrastructure and emphasizing a critical need for better mental health support in our schools (Stamm & Assefa, 2023).

Banning the book doesn’t solve these underlying issues. Instead, we should focus on improving our social support structures for distressed young people. The story “Thirteen Reasons Why” is a powerful reminder of the importance of empathy and understanding, particularly when addressing sensitive issues among teenagers.

In conclusion, Jay Asher’s novel is a powerful tool that encourages deep reflection on how to better support our youth. Rather than shying away from complex topics, we should use stories like these to spark meaningful conversations and push for changes that genuinely help those in need. Despite its controversies, I hope that this book will be read by many, whether they are parents, educators, or simply individuals who care about the well-being of young people.

 

References

Gomez, B. (2018, September 17). Banned Spotlight: Thirteen Reasons Why | Banned Books Week. Banned Books Week. https://bannedbooksweek.org/banned-spotlight-thirteen-reasons-why/

Graf, J. M. H. and N. (2019, February 20). Most U.S. Teens See Anxiety and Depression as a Major Problem Among Their Peers. Pew Research Center. https://www.pewresearch.org/social-trends/2019/02/20/most-u-s-teens-see-anxiety-and-depression-as-a-major-problem-among-their-peers/

Pappas, S. (2023, July 1). More than 20% of teens have seriously considered suicide. Psychologists and communities can help tackle the problem. Https://Www.Apa.Org. https://www.apa.org/monitor/2023/07/psychologists-preventing-teen-suicide

Stamm, K., & Assefa, M. (2023, June 1). There aren’t enough psychologists trained to treat kids in need. Here’s why. Https://Www.Apa.Org. https://www.apa.org/monitor/2023/06/psychologists-needed-to-treat-teens

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The Joys and Comforts of Returning Home from Vacation

Written 4/30/2024

Hello Dear Readers,

After a delightful break, it’s refreshing to be back in the comfort of our home. As invigorating as our getaway was, there’s a unique pleasure in returning to familiar surroundings and the daily rhythms of life. There’s nothing quite like the first night back in your own bed, complete with your favorite pillow and the comforting heft of a weighted blanket. Plus, it’s a relief to wake up on my own terms, without the early morning serenades from roosters, which was charming but less than restful!

Despite the fun and adventure, I did find myself missing the comforts of home, especially the way we manage the temperature indoors. This isn’t about how the weather back in Tennessee was any better but how we regulate our indoor climate, which stands out particularly during travels. Whether we’re headed to places known for their sweltering summers, like Florida or Tennessee, public places often seem to overcompensate with their air conditioning. This has been a consistent discomfort for me. I struggle with regulating my body temperature—too chilled indoors and overwhelmed by the heat outside.

My wife firmly believes that such extreme fluctuations in temperature aren’t just uncomfortable but could be harmful to our health. She argues that frequent, sharp changes in temperature force our bodies to adjust, potentially straining our autonomic nerves constantly. This concern is more than theoretical for us; following a stroke I experienced, maintaining a steady, “natural” temperature has become essential for my comfort. My wife’s approach to managing our home’s environment—keeping it at a steady 65°F (about 18°C) in winter and a mild 74°F (around 23°C to 24°C) in summer—has been a blessing. It has made me particularly sensitive to and appreciative of our home’s stable climate.

I find the stark contrast between the overly chilled interiors of many public spaces during summer and the excessively heated ones in winter increasingly troublesome. While businesses might think they are providing relief from the outside temperatures, the severity of the indoor cooling can be quite jarring. This is particularly poignant for someone like me, whose ability to adapt to temperature changes has been compromised.

Our recent vacation was yet another reminder of the value of the carefully controlled climate we’ve cultivated at home. It underscores how significant seemingly mundane aspects of our environment are to our comfort and health. As we resume our regular life, I am grateful not only for the experiences and memories we gathered while away but also for the renewed appreciation for the tranquility and stability of our home.

In conclusion, while vacations are a wonderful escape from the norm, they also sharpen our awareness of the comforts and conveniences of our everyday lives that we often take for granted. Returning home has not only given me back my comfortable sleeping arrangements but also renewed my gratitude for our ability to control our living environment, keeping it as welcoming and healthy as possible.

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Animal Encounters in the Florida Keys: A Vacation to Remember

Written 4/29/2024

Hello Dear Readers,

Recently, my wife and I wrapped up an enchanting vacation in the Florida Keys, a destination teeming with scenic beauty and a fascinating array of wildlife. Each encounter left a memorable mark on our journey, painting our experience with strokes of wonder and delight.

Upon our arrival, one of the first surprises was the chickens roaming freely around the Keys. It seemed every street was bustling with these semi-wild birds. Curiosity piqued, we inquired with locals and learned about their intriguing history. Brought over by Cubans for cockfighting, these chickens were later released to avoid a tax imposed on kept poultry after the sport was banned. With few natural predators, the chickens now thrive in the urban environment, dodging only the occasional car.

Our adventure continued with a visit to the Marathon Key aquarium, which offers interactive “experiences” with marine life. For a nominal fee, we were equipped with a cup of food and a tool to feed animals across various exhibits. The highlight for us was feeding the stingrays. 

Accustomed to human interaction, they swarmed the edge of their tank with the enthusiasm of flappy-hungry puppies whenever someone approached. It was a delightful sight, and their friendly antics, splashing joyfully for fish or shrimp treats, gave us a glimpse into their playful nature. We fed them twice, charmed by their eager behavior and the gentle flap of their wings against the water.

The final leg of our animal tour led us to the Hemingway House in Key West, once the residence of the famed author Ernest Hemingway and now a museum and sanctuary for his feline descendants. Nearly 60 cats live there, many bearing the genetic trait of polydactyly, which gives them an extra toe on each paw. This unique characteristic added an extra layer of fascination to our visit.

Interestingly, the house’s location in a city populated by chickens leads to occasional stand-offs between the two species. Both are protected, limiting how much their human caretakers can intervene. The strategy mainly involves keeping chickens out with a fence, hoping they stay on one side. At the same time, the cats contentedly remain on the other.

This journey to the Florida Keys was more than just a getaway; it was an immersion into a unique ecosystem where humans, animals, and history intertwine. Each encounter—whether with the historic chickens, the playful stingrays, or Hemingway’s extraordinary cats—gifted us with narratives to carry back home, enriching our lives with their simplicity and beauty.

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A First Taste of Adventure: Discovering Bubble Tea

Written 4/23/2024

Hello Dear Readers,

Today, my wife and I are set to explore a new culinary delight: bubble tea. This drink is something neither of us had sampled before, and we decided it was high time we changed that.

A few weeks back, my wife burst into my room with a question that caught me off guard: “Have you ever tried bubble tea?” When I admitted my inexperience, she excitedly proclaimed, “Brian, we have to try bubble tea—it looks so yummy!” Curiously, although she had seen bubble tea before, her sudden urge to try it puzzled me. But before I could inquire further, she explained, “Brian, I watched someone enjoying it on YouTube, and the joy on her face was infectious. I just had to find out what was making her smile like that.”

Interestingly, she hadn’t even seen a bubble tea ad. My wife usually listens to YouTube in the background rather than watching any of the channels, so for her to watch someone actively enjoying their drink was unusual.

After her revelation, she got into planning mode. Planning is crucial for her, even something as simple as trying a new drink. She dove into researching and soon came back with options for three bubble tea shops, just in case one was closed.

Next, she had to sift through her busy schedule to find the right time for our bubble tea adventure. She’s been swamped with preparing corporate taxes and budgets these days, so her free time is precious. She believes in picking the perfect moment for new experiences, especially when they can offer a respite from her work stress. Sometimes, her meticulous planning reminds me of Steris from the “Mistborn 2nd Era” series—before going digital, she used to carry her hefty planner everywhere.

Today, she declared, was the ideal day for our bubble tea expedition. The timing felt right because we planned to travel to the Keys tomorrow. I was more than happy to accompany her. When she sets her mind on something, she follows through, and I must admit, my curiosity about this drink has grown. Bubble tea may become our next favorite treat.

In our shared quest for new experiences, these little adventures not only add a dash of excitement to our lives but also bring us closer together. The anticipation is palpable as we prepare to step out and taste our first bubble tea. These moments, filled with simple joys and discoveries, enrich our days and create cherished memories. Maybe it’s the thrill of the unknown or the delight in sharing these firsts with each other, but whatever the outcome, today promises to be a delightful exploration of flavor and fun.

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Pushing Through: A Runner’s Resolve Amid Challenges

Written 4/17/2024

Hello Dear Readers,

Even for someone as seasoned as myself, running can sometimes become more difficult. Lately, I’ve been caught up in the marathon-like task of mowing the lawn because our vacation to Key West is fast approaching. Living in Tennessee, the grass grows exuberantly, even in what should be the mild month of April. Despite feeling physically drained, there’s still a sense of pride in how much I accomplished with the lawn yesterday.

I’m not sure if my fatigue is due to my kidney condition or just the physical toll from overexertion, or perhaps it’s a combination of both. Before my stroke, I was never truly dedicated to running; it was more my wife’s passion than mine. Hence, it was unclear if my kidney condition contributed to my increased fatigue. Yet, even on such draining days, I lace up my shoes and hit the pavement. Running feels laborious, almost zombie-like in pace, to the point where I overslept this morning.

Despite this, I’ve committed to running, a pledge I made years ago. My wife has always believed that keeping active is essential for my brain’s recovery. It’s something I’ve come to rely on, a trusty routine to propel me forward. The weather, according to my app, promises a warmer day than I’d prefer for a comfortable run. Although still weary, I managed to catch up on some sleep. Maybe today, I’ll just be a few seconds off my usual pace.

Running holds another significant place in my schedule today. This week is our last before the vacation, and there won’t be much running while we’re away. Despite how my body feels, the anticipation of our trip and the break from my daily runs gives me a reason to push a little harder today.

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Exploring the Irony of Banned Books in Key West

During my trip to Key West, I had an unforgettable experience at The Studios of Key West, located at Simonton Street and Eaton Street. The building caught our attention with its modern design and stylish window displays. Knowing my passion for books, my husband pointed it out during our first encounter with the place. Although we initially passed it by due to a planned visit to Hemingway’s house, we returned later.

Inside, I stumbled upon an intriguing book titled “Read These Banned Books,” published by the American Library Association. Flipping through it, I discovered a list of 100 books, some of which were familiar to me as dystopian novels, like “Brave New World” by Aldous Huxley, “1984” by George Orwell, and “The Hunger Games” by Suzanne Collins.

The term “banned” doesn’t imply that these books are entirely unavailable in the United States. They can be bought or borrowed from someone who has them, though they might not be found in your local library or school. Interestingly, The Studios of Key West had these books on display, reinforcing the belief that literature should remain uncensored.

It struck me as ironic that books like “Brave New World” and “1984,” which portray worlds plagued by extreme censorship, are themselves banned. If “Fahrenheit 451” were also on the list, it would complete the books I’ve discussed in a previous blog about literary censorship.

As someone who cherishes reading, I find banning books disheartening. While I’m no book critic or expert, I trust my ability to recognize compelling literature, which often leaves me with mixed feelings about banned books.

Now, I’d like to share a darker story and caution sensitive readers to proceed with care. In 2012, a book was published under a pseudonym by an author, Shonen A, who confessed to committing murders in Kobe, Japan, in 1997. The author was underage, and the name was not released. The victims were grade-schoolers, and the book was released without the knowledge of the victims’ families. I personally choose not to read or purchase such a book, as I cannot support profiting from others’ tragedies. The important thing is that I decided not to read the book.

Despite not being a professional critic, my curiosity drives me to explore these controversial books, many of which are influential yet banned. This exploration is not just about reading; it’s also about understanding the reasons behind their bans. I came across a lecture series titled “Banned Books, Burned Books Forbidden Literary Works,” which I plan to follow while I delve into these banned books.

There are 100 banned books on the list. It will take time to read them all, but I am committed to reading them slowly and with intent. My goal is not just to read but also to research and understand the context of their bans, ultimately forming my own opinions on whether these books deserve to be censored.

This journey through banned books is not only about discovery but also a personal statement on the importance of freedom in literature and the right to choose what we read, regardless of the controversy surrounding the content.