Resilience and Persistence are The keys to Getting Better

Written November 21, 2024

Hello Dear Readers,

Yesterday, my run felt perfect, and I could finally beat my pace time, so I avoided allowing my target pace to creep back up to 10 minutes per kilometer.  I’m not sure what made my pace time better. I even felt much better when running and pushing harder. My wife said that maybe I am getting a runner’s high from it. I think it’s a bit different. My muscles may have finally gained enough strength to keep up with my desired pace. Regardless, I was pretty pleased with how it felt and the effectiveness of my run.

The first time I started running was sometime in 2017. I got my brain stroke in 2015. My wife and I walked daily after I was out of the rehabilitation center and started living in my house. I remember I had to rest very often because I got neurofatigue from just walking. It felt like I played a chess tournament and played three games daily. In 2016, I started jogging. I could do only 1.5 KM (less than 1 mile) at a time. It was more like walking now about the time. Then my wife got me a good pair of running shoes. It motivated me because I knew my wife was trying to adjust my budget since she had to stay home to take care of me, especially from 2015 to 2016.

After she went back to work in 2017, I continued running. My mother was surprised at how much I developed my calves when we moved to Tennessee, where she lives. My wife wanted to move to Tennessee to be near my family. She has considered it since she returned to work in 2017. She said she was worried a lot when I was in a rehabilitation center. My mother came to live with me in 2015 to help us, but she also had her mother to care for. She had difficulties depending on my family for help, and her family is in Japan. After I moved, I continued running.

It helped where we live, which has a lot of hills, unlike the place we lived in Portland. Running up and down the hills helps me develop different muscle types. I worked to increase my distance. Last year, I ran four 10 km runs per week.

This year, I started working on my pace. I mainly used my running apps to monitor my pace. I gradually increased my running speed. One thing I was very careful about was never setting unrealistic goals, which is something I taught my students at University. 

My body is much more robust, and I have gained much more endurance despite my kidney condition. That is why I am not feeling the running high I am feeling. My body is in better condition for running. 

Here is my plan for now. I will adjust my goal if I run at the same pace on my next run. I am still hoping to reach 9:00min/kilometer by the end of next year, and each small victory encourages me to believe this goal is achievable.

This is How I Overcome My Cold Procrastination

Written November 20, 2024

Hello Dear Readers,

Winter can be challenging for running. The temperature in Nashville has swiftly dropped in the past few days. It’s just over 10 degrees cooler today than yesterday. Since it has been so warm until last week, my body has difficulty adjusting to the new temperature norm.

Since the brain stroke, my body has not been able to regulate the temperature well. Compared to February’s temperature, today’s temperature is not too cold; it’s just noticeably chilly compared to yesterday. The sudden temperature change impacted me in many ways, including my ability to do chores outside and run. 

When I think about these activities, procrastination becomes more tempting. It looks chilly outside, and my weather App also confirms this. While these tasks are essential, I also want to stay inside the warm house. 

So I just put on long sleeves for a run. I don’t think I need my windbreaker or running gloves yet. I act like this on the first step every time. Surprisingly, it works for me. Maybe it has something to do with humans’ very nature of difficulties letting go of something they started to work on. For me, running is something I have invested in for several years. 

My wife didn’t hesitate to get me nice running clothing. She said I was motivated to run the first time she got me a nice pair of running shoes. It motivated me to run longer. So, she made sure I had excellent running equipment. For herself, she made sure that she had running shoes or equipment with cold wind for running, but such equipment was only for her health purposes. She doesn’t care about a shirt or pants unless she starts to run longer distances, which she used to do in her 20s and 30s. 

Anyway, I put on my running clothing and shoes, and all my procrastination temptations went away. I managed to run despite this chilly weather. So, this is my little win against procrastination.

From Mowing Leaves to Life Lessons: Embracing Consistency After a Stroke

Written November 19, 2024

Hello Dear Readers,

Today, I’ve elected to forego leaf collection. Due to the warm rainy days last week, I decided to mow the lawn. As I mowed the lawn for the last time, I mulched the remaining leaves in our yard to the point I could skip leaving vacuuming chores for the day. Compared to the previous week, we are having some cold days. My body was somewhat used to the warmer days; I am having difficulty adjusting to this chilly weather again. 

We usually don’t have to mow around this time. I was somewhat disappointed at needing to mow again, as I had thought I’d finished that chore for the year. Somehow, the weather had its own plans. The erratic weather resulted in some late extra growth to create a little spring to the point that promoted grass and trees to create some new greens. Hopefully, I’ve now reached the end of mowing for the year. 

The mower mulched the relatively few leaves on our lawn, leaving it reasonably clear. So, skipping the leaves will be a pleasant break for me. I noticed some of my neighbors started to put Christmas decorations outside. Once Thanksgiving is over, there will be a lot more decorations. 

Ever since my brain stroke, I have learned to be consistent. I can’t imagine how I changed. I was more impulsive and liked to procrastinate. When I had to re-learn even basic actions, such as how to eat or walk, it taught me to be more patient. I learned that the best way to avoid forgetting to do something is to plan well and create a checklist. My wife is big on planning and making checklists. She jokes she does not trust herself to be consistent otherwise. 

I realized that consistency has excellent benefits. For one, I was able to run 10 km without problems. I even started doing my muscle training, and I gained a lot more muscle. I always had toned muscles because I used to do gymnastics. When I was in bed for almost two months after the stroke, I lost a lot of muscles. I sleep and wake up at the intended time, so my biological clock works. I had difficulties reading books due to my eyes, so my wife got me audiobooks. I listened to my audiobooks all the time. I also learned how to cook and Japanese. Now, I pick up on writing. 

Chores, like vacuuming leaves or even mowing, need consistency. I get tired much faster than before, especially when the weather is extreme. I will do as much as possible within my capacity, but I do them consistently. I get them done all the time. If I think like that, I lost a lot from my brain stroke, but I also gained good habits from it.

From Cold Mornings to Warm Reflections: Navigating Life After a Brain Stroke

Written November 16, 2024

Hello Dear Readers,

It was one of the days that I felt like I just wanted to stay in bed. Ever since I got my brain stroke, I cannot stand cold at all. Before I had my brain stroke, I had a much higher heartbeat and blood pressure, and I always felt hot. We used to live in Canada; my wife complained because I would open our bedroom window while sleeping. Ever since I can remember, my wife has kept her temperature around 65F or 18C during the winter. So our house would always be cool in the winter. I was hot all the time. Now, I feel cold.

I had difficulty forcing myself from bed this morning. I initially woke 45 minutes before my alarm. During the summer months, I would start my run early. But it’s so chilly. I hesitated. I crawled back to bed after using the restroom and fell back asleep. When my alarm sounded, I turned it off and snuggled back under the warm covers, staying awake but in bed and warm for a half hour. Despite the early morning, my wife was already out of bed a few hours before me. She wakes up much earlier every day.

Eventually, I forced myself to throw back the blankets and start my day. When I woke up, my wife was already done running, studying Geman, and writing something in the notebook in the dining room. She has more things to do in her morning routine, as she will create the menu for the upcoming week and create a grocery list. Somehow, we bought four limes that became bad after ten days, which she was upset about. She does not like wasting food ingredients since we should be able to control that with proper planning. Also, she thinks it is sinful to waste food. I know she lists why we wasted the food on the lists.  Then, she would write about how to avoid such an event again. The year is almost over, but we don’t have one page of wasted food. 

Observing my wife also made me question whether I had wasted time today. I’ve been delaying my run in my office, allowing it to warm up further, but I think I’ve wasted enough time now and will start my run shortly. I still need to do weekly house vacuuming chores and clean leaves outside. 

Later, I talked to my wife about this morning, and she said she would put on the space heater before she goes running going forward. She also understands that my body condition is different. I hope it will work better. 

Chilly Days, Leaves, and Adjusting to Nature’s Rhythm

Written November 12, 2024

Hello Dear Readers,

It’s so darn chilly today, but I must push myself to clean the leaves. The windy and rainy days made our front yard cluttered with leaves. This is what happens when I skip working on collecting leaves.

The hurricane gave Nashville a couple of chilly days. It has been so cold today that I almost wanted to stay inside the house. I waited a bit longer, hoping the temperature would be more tolerable. After I had a brain stroke, I lost control of my inner thermoregulation system. My skin feels the heat or chills more profoundly than before my brain stroke. I will adjust my schedule for outside chores since external conditions impact me more. If I didn’t have to finish the task today, I would instead want to complete the task in a better condition. 

Just like I hoped, a few hours improved the temperature. It seemed much warmer after a few hours. The lovely sunlight dried up the leaves enough to vacuum easily when I got outside. The wet leaves could be nasty sometimes; they get clogged in our leaf vacuum cleaner in the middle of the cleaning. 

On a day like this, I tweaked my schedule. I can still do the other chores in the house before doing any outside chores. I still have several tasks I need to complete besides the leaf vacuuming today. 

The several consecutive warm and humid rainy days confused our lawn with the season. They seemed much longer than a few weeks ago. It needs to be longer to mow the lawn, but I need to see how long it gets. 

I plan to do one more round of leave vacuuming this Thursday. I’ve checked the weather forecast. It will likely be another chilling morning. Luckily, no rain is predicted between now and then. The trees in front of our house lost a substantial amount of trees, hinting that my leaf vacuuming task will end soon.

Celebrating My Wife’s Journey to U.S. Citizenship

Written November 13, 2024

Hello Dear Readers,

Today is a very exciting day.  It is the culmination of my wife’s journey to become a US citizen.  In less than an hour, we’ll depart for the federal building in downtown Nashville, and eventually, she’ll go through the citizenship oath swearing ceremony. She’s been excited about this final step for quite a while now. 

My wife is uneasy about losing her immigration cards, both current and expired, which must be surrendered after being awarded citizenship. She told me that it is pretty expensive to get a new card. 

Since coming to the United States, she planned to get citizenship. She made sure not to leave the Country, as she said she would add more documents to submit to the immigration office. She wanted to make sure she could apply for citizenship without any sponsorship to satisfy all the requirements.

A few years after we moved to the United States, I got a brain stroke. We talked about many things, and we decided to move to Tennessee. She wanted the same job and exact address for 5 years to make the process easier. So she delayed the process. She thought it would be ideal to wait for 3 years and did not see any big problems. She decided to get another professional designation and a graduate degree while working full-time. She wanted to ensure she could contribute something of value to the United States.

Everything she does is part of a long-term plan. While her goals may span several decades, she reevaluates them weekly. I initially thought she acted quickly and impulsively when I didn’t know her well. Then, I realized many unscheduled items were on her list, and she inserted them into the schedule like a puzzle piece whenever the opportunity presented itself. 

I know she has been preparing for a long time. Our entire citizenship process was much shorter than we thought. She already had an interview a few days over six months ago and received a letter for the ceremony less than seven days after the interview. Unfortunately, it was scheduled in the middle of her interim audit. She had to work around her schedule to make time for the ceremony. She looked swamped, trying to get things done in time.

She looks delighted. She has been dutifully carrying her immigration documents as instructed for several years. It will take some time for her to grow accustomed to being unencumbered by documentation, as she soon will be. She’ll need to acquire a US passport and then have travel rights again.

Running Through the Seasons: A Humid Morning in Tennessee

Written November 6, 2024

Hello Dear Readers,

It felt almost like the early morning of early summer in Tennessee when I woke up. When I woke, it was raining a little, and that, combined with the unseasonably warm weather, led to an uncomfortably humid run. After my post-run shower, I checked my weather app and learned it was near 80% relative humidity. We have had hurricane after hurricane the last couple of weeks. We don’t get direct hurricanes like the southern coastal states of the United States, but we still get some secondary hurricane effects such as excess rain and wind.

We thought the temperature had been getting chilly in October, but it started warming up again. Compared to the dry August this year, we have had a lot of rain these days. It’s been pretty warm and humid. My wife told me that it felt like early summer morning when she ran this morning. 

It feels like there are more rainy days than last year. Rain can make leaves gain weight. I am planning to clear some of my leaves tomorrow. Hopefully, the rain will stop, making it easier for me to clean them. However, I am afraid we will have rain tomorrow. I hear there will be another hurricane approaching Texas. It is nothing new. The hurricane season usually lasts until the end of November. We will use up all the alphabet for hurricane names. Unlike the weather in Oregon, we do not have many rainy days in the winter. 

I love running in this season, though. The holiday season is approaching. We have Thanksgiving at the end of November. Some houses still have Halloween decorations. Some houses have autumn decorations for Thanksgiving Day. Thanksgiving Day is a big holiday for Americans. My wife said she felt odd because Canadian Thanksgiving Day is on Columbus Day. It makes sense since Canada is much colder than the United States. Once Thanksgiving Day is over, we will have Christmas and New Year. However by the time Christmas is near, the temperature will have dropped significantly. I wonder if I would enjoy any decorations while I was running.

It is beautiful outside despite the rain. One downside of a day like this is that it is inconvenient to collect leaves. However, it’s not as bad as it sounds. The leaves around our house still change color and look beautiful, and I enjoy the comfortable temperature. It’s more humid than I like, but at least with this humidity level, my skin is unlikely to feel dry while running. I should cherish the temperature and enjoy my running.

Fall Maintenance Chronicles: Tackling Leaves, Hurricanes, and a Leaf-Vacation in Nashville

Written November 7, 2024

Hello Dear Readers,

Near Thanksgiving day, our trees start to lose their dry clothing. They dropped so many leaves that there were so many to vacuum today. There were more leaves this year. A recent Hurricane brought a few windy days, and the wind carried the leaves from our neighbors. Due to our garbage bin being full of leaves from Tuesday’s collection session, I elected to skip today’s session as there’s nowhere to put them.  

Since October, we have had hurricane after hurricane. Hurricanes don’t hit Nashville directly, but our weather seems to sing along with them. We get the rain and wind. There is rain forecasted for this weekend, which may make leaf collection next week a bit more difficult, but I’ll do what I can.

In the future, we may want to get an extra garbage bin to hold a bag to dump leaves into.  We have some bags I could use, but throwing the leaves into an unsupported bag would be a lot of trouble.  So, today will be my vacation from leaf gathering, and I may have to pay for it next week.  Maybe I’ll be lucky, and the wind will magically blow all our leaves away without blowing new ones in to replace them.

Leaf vacuuming is one necessary maintenance task. When old leaves turn into soil, it creates unwanted deposits between concrete. Despite my work, there were weeds on the driveway. We had to weed them and clear them out with a power washer before damaging our driveway further. Besides, these dry trees make our front yard messy, so I want to keep them as neat as possible. 

Fortunately, leaf vacuuming is not as hard as lawn mowing, and the weather is more tolerable now than in summer. The days have gotten shooter, and winter will show up quickly. The trees in the backyard have lost most of their tree already. There will be 2-3 weeks of leaf vacuuming. Of course, we may get a rare snowstorm, which hit us every year for all 6 years we lived in Nashville. For now, I will enjoy this leaf vacation.

The Role of Women in The Great Gatsby

Reading “The Great Gatsby” by F. Scott Fitzgerald

Introduction

The Women of the 1920s

Over the decades following the Civil War, the United States became an industrial powerhouse with the introduction of mass production. Industrialization encouraged more women to join the workforce outside their homes. During World War I, about 4.8 million Americans served in the war, and women took on jobs that men had left behind, such as working in factories, serving as nurses, and managing farms. By 1920, 20% of American Women worked outside their homes. 

As more women stepped out of their domestic roles, they reevaluated their rights and demanded gender equality. Women spoke out about social issues they experienced, such as domestic violence and drinking, and formed organizations to fight for their right to vote. If women contributed to the economy just like men, they deserved a voice in political decisions. Their efforts paid off when the United States granted women suffrage on August 18, 1920.

The 1920s, the Rolling ’20s, represents a philosophical and cultural change. Industrialization made many electric appliances available to people and encouraged a materialistic society. As more women entered the labor force, they started redefining their roles and possibilities. Women, like flappers, challenged traditional gender roles and rebelled against ideas of marriage, family expectations, and parental control. Flappers became famous in cities like New York for their bold fashion statements. They wore shorter skirts and bobbed hair and challenged old-fashioned norms. These women symbolized the idea of independence, showing that women could have more possibilities in life.

The women in The Great Gatsby show what life was like during that time. They have unclear morals and are part of the story to show how people care more about money and things than doing what is right. Women seemed more independent than ever. At the same time, they also show the limits women faced in society and the economy. Women’s independence seemed also an illusion. In this blog, I’ll talk about their roles in the book and how they affect the story of The Great Gatsby.

Feminine Power and Vulnerability

The rolling 20s was like a paradigm shift to women’s roles, although these changes were often more surface-level than deep. Many people still disagree with this progressive idea. So, traditional norms and systemic barriers still limit women’s social and economic freedoms. For most women, marriage continued to define their role in society. Women who pursued independence—whether by working, living on their own, or expressing sexual freedom—were often harshly judged and labeled as “immoral.” It was still difficult for women to break free from societal expectations.

The Roles of Women in The Great Gatsby

Daisy Buchanan’s Impact on Gatsby

Daisy Buchanan is portrayed as an antagonist in the book. She symbolizes Gatsby’s ultimate goal, the American dream, where wealth and love intertwine. She drives Gatsby’s ambition to acquire wealth and status. Even Gatsby’s lavish lifestyle and parties are all designed to win Daisy back. Yet, there was a problem. She was from a completely different social class from Gatsby’s and was already married to Tom Buchanan. Gatsby sees her as perfection but is blind to her flaws and superficiality, resulting in his downfall and tragic death. Daisy represents Gatsby and his tragic idealism of the American Dream at the same time.

Daisy’s Materialism and Indecision

Daisy is portrayed as materialistic. Daisy doesn’t admire Gatsby; instead, she admires his rich, material possessions. She notices how his mansion looks “like a castle,” loves the beautiful gardens, and gets excited about the smells of flowers and the golden light around the house. She even cries over Gatsby’s shirts, but not because of Gatsby himself—just the luxury they represent. When Gatsby says that Daisy’s voice is “full of money” (p. 75), he sums her up perfectly.

Daisy values only wealth and the lifestyle it brings. In this way, she reflects the materialistic attitudes of many wealthy people in the 1920s. 

Daisy comes from an old-money family, growing up surrounded by wealth and privilege. She doesn’t just have money—she almost is money in how she acts and values. For example, when Daisy visits Gatsby’s mansion for the first time, the narrator says, “Daisy came out of the house, and two rows of brass buttons on her dress gleamed in the sunlight” (p. 57). The way her buttons shine in the sun seems like a reminder that Daisy is all about wealth and luxury.

To understand Daisy’s inability to choose Gatsby, we need to think about what life was like for women in the 1920s. Even though women had gained the right to vote and were starting to enjoy more freedom in this era, they were still held back by strict traditional gender roles. Did Daisy genuinely have the option to live independently? She might have been unhappy in her marriage to Tom, but running away with Gatsby—a man with no actual social standing—would have been a huge social and financial risk.

Daisy might seem like she has power, but her life is shaped by her need for wealth and her place in high society. Her choice to stay with Tom shows how much she depends on financial security and how trapped she is by social expectations. While she seems charming and free, underneath it all, Daisy is stuck in a system where men hold the power and women must rely on them. 

Emotional and Moral Impact:

Daisy’s inability to make a clear choice and her retreat to the comfort of wealth play a big part in Gatsby’s downfall. She can’t stand up to Tom or fully commit to Gatsby, which shows how empty and shallow Gatsby’s dream really is. Gatsby gives up everything for Daisy, even taking the blame for Myrtle’s death, showing how much his life is centered on a dream he can never truly have. In the end, Daisy runs back to her husband and the security of his money, leaving Gatsby behind.

The Relationship Difference Between Tom and Gatsby

Daisy’s relationship with Gatsby is about reliving the romance of the past, while her relationship with Tom is more like a practical marriage partnership. With Gatsby, Daisy seeks the excitement and thrill of love, but she finds the security and stability she needs with Tom. No matter how rich Gatsby becomes, he can never offer Daisy the sense of safety that Tom provides.

Daisy never seriously considers having a committed relationship with Gatsby. Her hesitation is evident in the book when it says, “She hesitated. Her eyes fell on Jordan and me with a sort of appeal, as though she realized at last what she was doing—and as though she had never, all along, intended doing anything at all” (p. 82). This moment shows that Daisy is unsure of her actions and unwilling to commit to Gatsby fully.

Jordan Baker’s Role

A Mirror to Nick’s Integrity

Jordan Baker has an exciting role in the book. She appears as a Foil to Nick. A foil is a literary device highlighting a particular quality or trait of other characters by contrast. Jordan’s modern independence and moral ambiguity contrast with Nick’s Midwestern values and his struggle with honesty. While Nick prides himself on being “honest” and reserved, Jordan’s deceitful, carefree attitude challenges his worldview. She exposes Nick’s internal conflict about his complicity in the moral failings of the people around him.

Foil to Gatsby

While Gatsby is idealistic and clings to the past, Jordan is pragmatic and lives entirely in the present. This makes her a subtle foil to Gatsby through her impact on Nick, who grows increasingly critical of Gatsby’s refusal to accept reality. 

Romantic Influence 

Nick and Jordan’s relationship is more casual. Jordan’s dispassionate approach to relationships contrasts with Gatsby’s obsessive love for Daisy, underscoring the futility of Gatsby’s dream. Their relationship is a smaller version of the novel’s bigger idea. Jordan’s independent attitude clashes with Nick’s mid-western traditional values. Ultimately, Nick feels that Jordan let him down, so he breaks up with her when he realizes how careless she is. Nick despises the selfish and immoral behavior of the wealthy people around him and leaves for the West.

Conclusion

Understanding Daisy and Jordan’s roles in this book is critical to understanding the author’s messages behind the story. Their impacts on Gatsby and Nick highlight the complexities of relationship society grappling with rapid social changes in the early 1920s United States. 

Daisy motivates Gatsby’s rise, but she also exemplifies the emptiness of his dream. Jordan challenges Nick’s ideas by failing to inspire genuine growth or connection. These dynamics mirror the paradox of the 1920s: a time of progress and rebellion but also persistent inequality, particularly in the expectations and limitations placed on women. I cannot stop feeling Fitzgerald’s cynicism toward women’s independence and the American dream from the plot and the book’s characters. 

Something You Want to Think About

The women in The Great Gatsby are judged more harshly than the men. When I first read the novel, I really disliked Daisy. However, this time around, it made me question my initial reaction. Daisy is criticized for her choices, yet Tom’s cheating and Gatsby’s illegal activities are often overlooked or even admired. This seems to reflect the hypocrisy of the 1920s when women’s freedoms were still restricted by a male-dominated society, even though they were making progress in other areas. I think these types of hypocrisy still exist in the world, and I am also a hypocrite for exercising double standards. Do you think this double standard still exists today? I’d love to hear your thoughts!

A Day of Health Priorities: Balancing Life with Kidney Care

Written November 4, 2024

Hello Dear Readers,

Today was one of those irregular days. I had an appointment with my nephrologist later this morning. On such days, I adjust my morning routine around the doctor’s appointment. The doctor’s appointment was an absolute priority for me as I have a kidney issue. So, I had to cram my morning routine elements into a smaller amount of time than usual. 

I create a mental list of to-do tasks each morning. This is the time I had to tweak my schedule for a day like this.  I wanted to get my run still before I went, so I didn’t have extra time to spare. 

My schedule was packed, but I managed to finish my run and shower before getting ready to go. I even got there a little earlier than the requested 15 minutes before the scheduled appointment and had to wait nearly an hour before I saw my doctor. 

He reported that the labs run on the blood I submitted last week revealed an uptick in kidney function, so I have more than fully recovered from the summer’s kidney lab report. We calculate our food intake carefully every day. My wife selects many and sorts out all the ingredients for the week we eat every week so we don’t accidentally overeat something wrong for my kidney. I’ve also been drinking enough water not to overstress my kidneys. 

Being healthy means we have to commit. Our eating habits are much more restricted because I have many food restrictions. I wish I had been mindful of my lifestyle way before I had the health problems. However, what happened has already happened. I want to make my future right. Being healthy is a life-long journey. Of course, I have my day when I get the temptation of slacking with my routines. On a day like that, I try to remember the time I had a lot of problems recovering from a brain stroke. 

I know I was fortunate. I had family who took care of me when I was in trouble. I managed to recover my kidney conditions from stage 5 to stage 3. So, I will keep my commitment to retaining my kidney function.