Category: Brian’s Journey

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The Art of Ritualistic Routines: How Mental Tricks Add Value to Daily Tasks

A Mental trick I use to help me take all of the decided-upon steps of a routine is to think of it as a ritual. This is aided by the inclusion of additional behaviors that are primarily superficial. 

While creating these rituals may make some tasks more complicated than necessary, I find that when I complete a routine precisely as intended, I feel more of a sense of accomplishment. As I said, this is purely a mental trick I use and, aside from the additional feelings of accomplishment, adds very little of use to the routine, but it also costs extremely little.

An example of this is my drying off routine when I finish showering. It begins with turning my left foot toward the shower head and drying off my face, then I turn my right foot, dry my hair, and mentally count 1. Each step involves rotating a foot, 1/8th of a turn, and counting upward. Next, I dry my arms. Left inside, then outside, Right inside and out. I dry my back on the 5th count/ foot rotation, and the 6th is my buttocks. 7th, I dry my left leg and then my right leg. On counts 9 and 10, I pat dry my face and hair a final time before hanging my towel up on count 11. On count 12, I step out of the shower and dress myself. My counting continues through this process, and if I do it right, it ends at 20 when I step into my right slipper.  

I know that facing specific directions and counting is unnecessary, but it feels right to do it that way. It also ensures that I complete all steps, which could be annoying, even though it’s not very likely to happen. Most of my rituals come naturally after I notice that I do things in a certain way. Only after thinking about the process do I decide if that’s the best way to do things. Sometimes, a budding ritual might need to be tweaked a little to make it fit with a count better or to align with something else.

You might fall into rituals as you form longer routines, and I encourage you to adopt them intentionally. They cost exceptionally little and may add some additional satisfaction to their completion.

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The Power of Routine: A Personal Journey of Supporting a Loved One

Hello, Dear readers,

After experiencing a stroke and losing my job, I made a heartfelt commitment to support my wife in any way I could. She transitioned into the role of the primary earner for our small household, excelling in her work far beyond the call of duty. Her hard work has not gone unnoticed; she’s earned numerous corporate awards and sees significant raises nearly yearly. Given her dedication, I make it a point to shoulder any chores or tasks she might otherwise feel obligated to do. This decision has allowed me to hone habit formation and routine building.

While I still need to fill my week with tasks, the possibility looms. There might come a day when I have to scale back or adjust my routine, perhaps rotating some monthly chores instead of tackling them weekly. I recently had an affirming moment when I returned from a week-long vacation with my sisters. My wife exclaimed those certain chores had gone undone in my absence. Although she managed to cover most bases, routine tasks awaited me. I saw this as a triumph, indicating that my efforts lighten her load. My system successfully achieves its intended purpose, which is as much as one can hope for.

Periodic evaluation of my routines is crucial. I need to assess whether they align with their intended goals or if some need to be modified or scrapped. This doesn’t require constant attention but should be an annual exercise. Over the past few years, my wife and I have discussed our significant goals for the coming 12 months around the New Year. This reflective moment is an excellent opportunity to review the efficacy of my established routines and habits.

Thank you for joining me on this journey, and I hope my experiences offer you some valuable insights into the importance of thoughtful habit formation.

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Two Proven Methods for Identifying Habits You Actually Need

Hello Dear Readers,

One of the challenges in establishing good habits is figuring out which practices you need. There are many strategies to spot these gaps in your life, and I’ve tried a few. Today, I want to share two methods that have worked well for me.

The first approach is straightforward: pay attention to your immediate environment. Look for tasks, especially repetitive chores, that need doing. Once you’ve identified an assignment, the next step is to decide how often it needs to be done.

Sometimes, determining the frequency is easy because experts have already provided recommendations. Take, for example, the air filters in our HVAC system. I talked to our HVAC technician about routine maintenance to extend the life of our heater and AC. He recommended changing the air filters monthly. Based on his advice, we set up a recurring Amazon order for inexpensive air filters. I also created a monthly reminder on my phone.

There are times, however, when you have to determine the frequency yourself. In such cases, you might need to revisit and adjust the interval to fit your life circumstances better.

The second method I use for identifying habits involves listening to those around me. Specifically, it grabs my attention if I hear my wife or anyone else complain about the same thing three times. I consider whether it’s something I can take action on. Using this approach, I’ve established some beneficial habits. For instance, I’ve gotten into cleaning our cat’s litter box, scrubbing our toilets, and calling my parents more regularly.

These strategies help you identify gaps in your routine. Building a complete set of habits is a gradual process. It’s usually better to let them accumulate over time rather than trying to establish them all at once.

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The Power of Small Steps: How Breaking Down Goals Leads to Big Wins

One lesson I continually learn in my journey of habit formation is the power of small, consistent goals. Achieving startling results can sometimes require herculean efforts. For example, last year, I ran over 1,000 miles. It might sound like a lot, if I only intended to run it in a month. Instead, I broke it down into smaller, more manageable distances. This approach allowed me to hit that considerable number over time.

I’m naturally inclined to try and accomplish goals in one giant leap, but this often leads to failure. For instance, I recently committed to better caring for our front yard. My first task was to weed the planter areas. Initially, it seemed like an overwhelming job. However, by dedicating just 20 minutes a day to it, I found it more manageable. I expect to finish the tendering of our front yard sometime this week without being subjected to a back-breaking, all-day endeavor.

If you need help to achieve your goals or even to get started, consider breaking them down into smaller tasks. The temptation to tackle everything all at once is strong but only sometimes effective. Intellectually, I understand this. Yet, the urge to “do it all now” still pops up.

When setting my goals, I make it a point to remind myself to break them into smaller tasks. I plan to work on these smaller tasks over a more extended period. Starting earlier and extending the timeline can be a safer and more effective approach for various activities.

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Goal-Setting 101: How to Use Rules and Triggers for Habit Building

t helps to determine rules and triggers to develop and maintain your habits. As with my running goal last year, I knew that sometimes events would conspire against me being able to meet my 35k per week goal. As such, I needed to determine some rules to play by. I had to ensure that my rules supported my plan rather than excuses I could fall back on. The first step I took in crafting my rules was to investigate what my goal was.

 

My goal was to run 35k per week, but I wanted to regain mobility endurance and support my health. Recognizing these as my real goals helped me create appropriate rules. For example, one of my rules is that I will not run if there is snow/ice on the ground. This rule would conflict if my true goal were the 35k per week. However, since my true goal is mobility, doing something that has a substantial risk of decreasing my mobility via a broken ankle from slipping/falling is counterproductive.

I tested all of my potential rules against my goals in this manner. Setting up rules like this is crucial because otherwise, I would be relying on Ad Hoc decisions, which are too easily influenced by current emotions.

As much as I wanted to achieve my actual goals and that I became focused on reaching 35k each week, there were plenty of days when I dreaded running, and it took great effort to force myself to go out. If I had not established a strict running schedule on Monday, Wednesday, Friday, and Saturday, I probably would have made excuses and failed to achieve my goal by missing too many days.

The other half of this equation is setting up triggers. Triggers are events or times that prompt a response or when to apply a rule. Every run day, my trigger for getting ready for running is after I use the bathroom. Every morning, after breakfast and coffee, I’ll eventually have to use the toilet; I use this as my trigger for running. After I use the bathroom, I change into my running clothes instead of returning to my computer. My no running on snow ice rule is triggered by looking out the front door when I get my second cup of coffee. If there’s snow/ice visible on my ground now, I cancel my run.

So when trying to develop your habits, First figure out your actual goals and test your habit ideas against your real goals. Second, build your ruleset so you’re not relying on feelings or motivation, and be strict with your rules. Don’t give yourself any excuses for ignoring your rules. You might need to create a new rule if you can’t do the desired behavior. Just ensure you test this new rule against your goals. Finally, make your triggers. Use alarms on your phone if you can’t find commonly occurring events.

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Running Through Rehab: How I Built a Consistent Running Habit

I’ve been running regularly for the past five years. I began my current running program when we still lived in Portland, Oregon. My wife and I had been walking nearly every day since I’d been released from rehabilitation, and I felt I had progressed enough to try running.

A few years before this, I had attempted to get into running but hadn’t committed to it, but I had learned about the couch to 5k running program (c25k). I had enough commitment to maintain my running schedule and found an app for my phone, which allowed me to import some of my music into this program.

 

Couch to 5K (C25K) Program

C25k fit me quite well; it starts relatively slow with short-run segments with walking segments between them. Each week, the run segments get longer and the walk segments shorter. After five weeks, I ran for the entire time, about 5 kilometers. I went through this program several times, and each time, it got easier, and I got faster.

 

Zombies, Run!

Then my wife heard about a running app that was gaining popularity at the time, Zombies, Run! It’s an app that uses game concepts to motivate running. It’s set during a zombie apocalypse, and you play a character helping a small settlement of survivors by running. During each mission, you collect or deliver items while randomly acquiring materials to build your settlement. I found it quite interesting, and motivated me to run more and more to find out what happens next in the story.

After running 5k three times per week for a year, I was ready to push myself more, and I found an extension program by the same group that made the c25k program, which smoothed the transition from 5k to 10k using the same concepts of increasing the duration of run segments and shortening the walk segments. Again, this worked well for me, and I was proud of being able to run 10k. I won’t say it was easy, but it was possible.

 

An Added Challenge

I kept with this as we moved to Nashville, Tennessee; however, this move added a challenge to overcome. The average climate in Nashville is quite different from Portland. It is quite a bit warmer in Nashville, and I needed to keep myself hydrated while running. Luckily, my habit of counting steps helped me figure out a schedule for sipping my sports drink.

I use the schedule every 400 steps; I pause for a few seconds and drink. Conveniently, I discovered that 400 steps is roughly half a kilometer for me.

Now equipped with a rehydration schedule, I ran 5k nearly every day. It took me a while to get used to the new environment. After running 5k at least three times per week for a year, I aimed to push myself further by increasing my run distance by a kilometer each month. During the first month, I ran three 5k per week, then gradually increased to three 6k per week, and eventually, I was able to run 10k three times per week. My goal was to improve my endurance and speed.

 

1 Month: 3 x 5K (to get used to running)

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.

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End: 3 x 10K

 

While I was faster at running 5k, I wasn’t as fast as I wanted to be, although I doubt I ever will be; however, as long as I’m getting better, I should be content with my progress. I repeated this sequence a couple more times and then set a new goal: I will run 35k per week for a year.

3x10k and 1x5k. Some weeks were harder than others, and I had to figure out how to balance my running schedule with other activities and impediments like weather.

 

I had to set up rules so every solution to a complication wasn’t ad hoc but part of a comprehensive plan. First, I made a goal statement: to run 35k per week. Then, I made a list of likely impediments, which included inclement weather and other obligations like birthday parties or doctor’s appointments. Scheduling appointments was easy since I set running days separate from appointment days.

 

The other complications were more brutal to balance, but I found that if I couldn’t juggle the days to fit my schedule, I could spread my anticipated missed days running over the other days so, instead of 3x10k + 1x5k, I could run 2x12k and an 11k. I was happy as long as I accomplished my primary goal of 35k.

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From One Step to 10K: How Small Choices Built a Resilient New Me After a Stroke

People can be characterized by the sum of their habits.

Everybody has habits, but not everybody chooses their habits. Every choice you make is a step toward forming a life-long habit. As such, making choices that lead you toward your desired destination is critical. So, the first step toward developing good habits is deciding where to end up.

 

After my stroke, I wanted to regain my lost mobility and lessen the burden on my wife I had become. The first step along this journey was to be able to take more than one step between resting. My wife helped immensely with this, and we went on daily walks around our Portland neighborhood.

At first, it was challenging as I had to concentrate on moving my legs. One of the things I lost from the stroke was unconscious control of movements. Walking required concentrating on activating the right leg muscles in the proper order, and doing this for more than a couple of steps resulted in neuro-fatigue, a term I learned during physical therapy.

Neuro-fatigue might be something you’ve experienced if you’ve ever spent a long late night studying for an exam the next day and felt exhausted despite being largely sedentary. This used to happen to me just from walking due to the concentration and mental effort this once simple act demanded. Counting my steps helped me maintain my focus on walking, and it also gave me a way to track improvement.

Initially, I would need to sit down and rest every 50 steps. Still, eventually, I was able to last the hour-long walk until we got home again. Now, I can run 10 kilometers without having to sit down midway. In my next posting, I’ll provide a more detailed description of how I built up to a 10k run.

 

If you want to achieve something, you’ve already taken the first step toward accomplishing it, but you need to take the next step. As I see it, the next step is to subdivide your path into small portions. In my walking, this was easy to determine; I just needed to try and put one more effort than I did on the previous walk. If I failed, I had to try that number repeatedly if necessary. Eventually, I would succeed, and I could increase my goal again.

Eventually, I discovered that what was once all I could manage was now merely halfway to my current goal. If you’re stumbling and trying to take your next step, try making your step smaller.

 

Remember the fable about the tortoise and the hare: slow and steady will win many races.

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Unbroken Spirit: Conquering Life Post-Stroke

Welcome, dear reader, to the birth of my blog. I am Brian Lempke, a 44-year-old American who, after discussing with my wife, has decided to share some of the techniques I’ve had to develop to improve myself. 2015, I suffered a right cerebral hemorrhagic brain stroke, nearly killing me. Luckily for my survival, my wife found me and called for an ambulance before I expired. Also, luckily, we happened to be living in Portland, Oregon, at the time, home to a very fine neurological hospital department at OHSU.

After my initial recovery, whereby I regained consciousness and formed some foggy memories of existence, I was transferred to the first of two stints in a rehabilitation unit where I was constantly assessed and underwent physical, occupational, and speech rehabilitation. Eventually, I recovered enough that I was transferred to another rehabilitation institute. This one had a more beneficial patient ratio, and I have much fonder memories of it. My days I was blurred through my daily life being coordinated by medical professionals who constantly assessed my cognitive and physical capabilities. At this time, I could barely stand, let alone walk. I was taught how to use a walker and given strength-rebuilding training.

Eventually, I was released to the care of my wife at home and began my true recovery process, which will be the focus of my blog. I used what I learned from the rehabilitation facilities, other doctors, nurses, and my errors. While there will likely always be after-effects of my stroke and some things that I cannot completely heal, in some ways, with my wife’s support, I’ve surpassed my pre-stroke self.

In this blog, I will detail the goals I set, the obstacles I encountered, and how I have worked to overcome them. If I could achieve the recovery I’ve enjoyed, others can do it and perhaps even better than I managed in my stumbling. Immediately after my stroke, my wife searched online for hints about what she could expect and how to help me. She couldn’t find much, so this blog may help others search as my wife did. I hope that some of my techniques can be used by those who haven’t suffered a stroke and won’t have as far to climb. I hope that my blog can provide you with some tricks and tips to help you along your self-improvement journey and provide some entertainment.