Category: Brian’s Journey

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The Struggle of Practicing My Own Advice: Coping with Loss and Self-Care

Hello to my cherished readers,

Today, I grapple with the tricky endeavor of heeding my counsel from just a day ago. As some may know, my long-time furry companion, Gambi, passed away yesterday at 16. Acknowledging the weight of this loss, I allowed myself to step back from my routine. Sure, I managed to pull off a single exercise set and even went for a run, but sitting down to write eluded me. Yet even as I mourn Gambi, who meant the world to me, I must acknowledge the importance of sticking to my other commitments. While I did fall short in some areas yesterday, I feel a sense of pride for pushing myself to do what I did manage to accomplish.

Yesterday was tough, no doubt about it. However, a surprising solace came in the form of exercise. It wasn’t a magic cure; emotionally, I was still shattered. Still, something about the physical activity provided me a slight reprieve. Reflecting on that experience has made it easier to muster the energy to exercise today. Slowly but surely, I intend to get back in the saddle. I’m not naïve enough to think that I’ll swiftly move on from the absence of Gambi in my life. Still, through sheer will and effort, I anticipate that, eventually, I’ll come close to being the person I was before.

Arguably, the most challenging part of this transition has been grappling with how ingrained Gambi was in my nightly ritual. For years, my bedtime routine commenced with calling Gambi into the bedroom. As I nestled into bed, I’d tell her I was ready for our usual evening snuggles. She’d promptly saunter over, perch on my right shoulder, and start purring, a comforting sound that had become as essential to me as a lullaby. The gaping void left by her absence makes me wonder how I’ll adapt my routine to compensate for this loss. Although uncertain about what will fill that emotional space, I am optimistic that something will eventually.

For now, the most I can do is heed the advice I’ve been doling out all along. It’s challenging, but if I expect to encourage others, it’s vital that I also live by those principles myself. Self-care and maintaining routine might feel like climbing a steep hill. Still, they’re crucial steps toward navigating through this emotional labyrinth.

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Turning Setbacks into New Beginnings: The Art of Maintaining Streaks

Hello Dear Readers,

As you strive to build successful routines and habits, there will inevitably be days when obstacles throw you off course. The weather, unexpected emergencies, or simple fatigue disrupts your meticulously planned performance. Due to unforeseen circumstances, I recently faced such a challenge when I could only complete one set of exercises instead of the scheduled two. While you can’t rewrite the past, you can control how you navigate the future.

A Chinese proverb wisely states, “The best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago; the second-best time is now.” This aphorism reminds us that although we can’t undo our failures, the next best thing is to act immediately to rectify them. Resilience isn’t just about avoiding loss; it’s about your recovery speed. Dusting yourself off and getting back on track is what truly counts.

Losing a streak can be disheartening, especially when you’ve invested significant time and effort into maintaining it. For example, I’ve consistently practiced Japanese language exercises on an app for over 250 days. Although I take immense pride in this achievement, I must acknowledge that this isn’t my first streak. It is, however, the longest one I’ve maintained. While I aim to continue without interruptions, life sometimes cooperates with our plans. Sometimes, unforeseen circumstances can disrupt even the most entrenched habits.

When setbacks occur, the key is not to dwell on them but to take them as learning opportunities. The first step is to evaluate the reason behind the break in your routine. Once you identify the root cause, you can develop strategies to prevent similar interruptions in the future.

The art of maintaining a streak lies in its renewal. A broken streak isn’t a dead end; it’s a junction that points you toward a new path, offering you a chance to build a longer, more robust streak. It’s like planting a new tree in your garden of habits; the more you nurture it, the more resilient it becomes, capable of withstanding future storms.

So, the next time you find your routine interrupted, don’t see it as a setback but as an opportunity for a fresh start. Learn from it, adapt your strategies, and continue your journey toward self-improvement. Plant that new tree today, and watch it grow more potent than the last one. With this mindset, you transform every end into a new beginning, turning setbacks into setups for future success.

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The Power of Mental Triggers: An Effective Technique for Remembering Things

Hello Dear Readers,

If you’ve ever found yourself forgetting something important, you’re not alone. Forgetfulness is a common human experience, but it doesn’t have to be. Today, I’m excited to share a nifty memory trick that has worked wonders for me. Initially, I used it to remember to stick to my exercise routine. Still, I soon realized its applicability extends to almost anything.

The Mental Trigger Technique

The technique involves setting up ‘mental triggers’ to help you recall information or tasks at specific times. Here’s how it works:

  1. Set a Clear Goal: The first step is clearly defining what you want to remember. It could be a task like doing exercises or something informational like a grocery list.
  2. Choose a Time or Situation: Identify the time or situation when you want to recall this information. This is the ‘trigger event’.
  3. Visualize the Scenario: Next, create a vivid mental image of what you’ll experience during this trigger event. The more detailed the picture, the better.
  4. Link the Goal to the Imagined Scenario: Connect your Goal to this mental image. When you encounter the imagined scenario in real life, it acts as a trigger to remind you of your Goal.

Case Study: The Grocery Store

Let’s consider a relatable example. My wife often asks me to remind her of something once we get home. In this scenario, she has already set the Goal and the trigger event for me. My job becomes easier; I only have to picture us walking through the door when we get home. I then linked her request to that mental image. The visual trigger helps me remember what she asked when we walked through the door.

The Limits of the Technique

Of course, no technique is flawless. The success of this memory hack largely depends on how closely your imagined scenario aligns with reality. For instance, I often use this technique to remember grocery items. The trigger can fail if the grocery store has a new display or a rearranged layout that diverges from what I had visualized.

Conclusion

While not infallible, this technique has proven highly effective, surpassing other strategies I’ve tried. It’s incredibly versatile and can be tailored to suit a variety of situations and tasks. If you often need help with forgetfulness, give this method a whirl. It’s precisely what you’ve been looking for to enhance your memory and simplify your life.

So, go ahead and set those mental triggers! See if this technique can become a valuable tool in your daily life, just as it has in mine.

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A Journey to Improved Oral Hygiene: Rising from Health Challenges

Embarking on a journey towards improved oral hygiene was not initially a matter of choice but a necessity born from a health crisis I never expected to face – kidney failure. Finding myself on the organ transplant list was a wake-up call, and one of the prerequisites I encountered was obtaining a certification from a dentist confirming the absence of any infections. This unexpected requirement ignited a newfound motivation, compelling me to view oral hygiene as an essential aspect of self-care that deserved my undivided attention.

 

As I navigated through this unfamiliar territory, I initiated a fundamental yet diligent routine, ensuring that my teeth were brushed thoroughly every night before drifting into sleep. It wasn’t long before I expanded my regimen, incorporating a water pick and mouthwash to further enhance my oral care. Eventually, adding dental floss completed my comprehensive suite of oral hygiene practices.

 

The journey to establishing this routine wasn’t without its challenges. I found myself in consultations with my dentist, delving into discussions about the sequence in which each task should be performed for optimal results. After numerous conversations and some trial and error, I solidified my pattern. The process commenced with dental flossing, followed by brushing, proceeding with the water pick, and culminating with a refreshing mouthwash swish.

 

Establishing this rigorous oral hygiene routine has been a source of immense satisfaction for me. My wife, a constant pillar of support, has openly acknowledged the visible improvement in the appearance of my teeth and gums. Her affirming observations serve as gratifying validations of my efforts, albeit with a hint of shame reflecting on my previous negligence. However, I continually remind myself that the past, with its failures and oversights, is unchangeable, and the future holds the potential for transformation and improvement.

 

This realization has been instrumental in maintaining my commitment to my enhanced oral care routine. Every step, every brushstroke, and every flossing session is a testament to my resolve to do better, not just for the sake of meeting medical requirements but for my overall well-being. The journey hasn’t been merely about avoiding infections or ticking off a box on the transplant list; it’s been a holistic exploration of self-care, health, and personal growth.

 

Reflecting on this transformative journey, I’m enveloped by a sense of accomplishment and a renewed sense of responsibility toward my health. The shame that initially accompanied my efforts has gradually transformed into empowerment, fueling my determination to maintain and further improve my oral hygiene. Despite the challenges, this experience has been enlightening, underscoring the importance of proactive health management and the profound impact of seemingly simple routines on overall well-being.

 

In embracing this change, I’ve discovered that our past failures do not define us. Instead, they present opportunities for growth, learning, and improvement. While my journey toward improved oral hygiene commenced from a place of necessity, it has evolved into a voluntary and gratifying pursuit of better health. It serves as a poignant reminder that it’s never too late to change, adapt, and thrive.

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Unleash the Power of Mental Triggers for Better Memory

Hey, wonderful readers!

Let me pull back the curtain on an ingenious technique I’ve been using to improve my memory. Initially, I began honing this strategy to keep up with my exercise routine but soon realized its potential for aiding memory in many situations. You may already be familiar with setting triggers for remembering routine activities. This strategy works similarly and employs mental cues to help you remember anything you want.

Here’s the low-down: It starts with identifying a specific goal you want to remember. Next, you choose a particular moment or setting to recall this goal. The last piece of the puzzle is creating a vivid mental image of what you’ll see or experience at that moment. This mental snapshot serves as your trigger—when the real-life scenario mirrors your imagination, it prompts you to remember what you intended.

Let me give you a slice-of-life example. Often, while out and about with my wife, she’ll mention something she wants to be reminded of when we return home. In such instances, the heavy lifting has mostly been done by her; she has already chosen what should be remembered and when it should be recalled. All I have to do is visualize us arriving home and walking through the door. This imagery then acts as a mental anchor, linking the envisioned scenario to what my wife wants to remember.

Now, I won’t sugarcoat it—this strategy isn’t foolproof. The accuracy of your mental trigger is crucial for the technique to work. If the actual situation diverges significantly from what you’ve imagined due to an unforeseen circumstance, the mental trigger might not go off. For instance, I’ve tried using this approach to remember items we must pick up from the grocery store. Suppose the store has decided to rearrange its layout or introduce a new display. In that case, the disparity between my mental image and reality can throw a wrench into the works, causing me to forget what I intended to purchase.

But let me tell you, even with these occasional hiccups, this memory trick has proven to be far more effective than any other method I’ve attempted. So, give it a whirl and see how it enhances your memory game. Think of it as fine-tuning your mental GPS to help you navigate the labyrinth of daily tasks and commitments. If done right, this little hack could become a life-saver—or at least a memory-saver—for you too!

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The Art of Routine Building Through Mundane Chores Like Cooking

Hello, dear readers,

Today’s post is dedicated to the unexpected but delightful art of routine building through what we often consider mundane chores. Take cooking, for instance—a chore for some, a passion for others. I’ve always had a soft spot for cuisine, an affinity that traces back to my childhood learning to make pancakes with my grandmother. I didn’t realize back then that cooking would later become a tool for optimizing complex, multi-step procedures in life.

The Complexity Behind Simplicity in Cooking

In culinary arts, one of the most essential skills is mastering the alignment of various tasks to be completed simultaneously. Even a simple dish like scrambled eggs or a sandwich requires a calculated sequence of steps, each executed at the perfect time. The difference between a skilled chef and a beginner often boils down to the knack for optimizing this workflow. It’s about knowing what to do, when, and how to do it.

Embracing Reflection: The Japanese Concept of Hansei

One powerful concept I’ve come to rely on for improving my cooking skills is the Japanese practice of Hansei, which involves deep self-reflection after completing a task. The core idea is to analyze performance, understand mistakes, and strategize for future improvement. If you’re repeating a specific recipe, it’s a golden opportunity to employ Hansei. Taste the food, ponder what you like and dislike, and consider why those elements turned out the way they did. The objective is to refine the recipe each time, adapting it to align with your taste preferences.

The Case of Mapo Tofu: A Personal Experience

To provide a real-world example, let me share my experience of making Mapo Tofu, which my wife taught me. When we first tried the dish, we found it too salty despite not adding any table salt. That led to a Hansei moment—time for some culinary detective work. After scrutinizing the ingredients, I switched to reduced-sodium chicken stock instead of the Chinese-style tori gara I had initially used. The change was adequate but not quite enough. I then dived into the sauce ingredients, reducing the quantity of one while substituting it with another, less salty ingredient. And voila! The saltiness issue was resolved, all thanks to the iterative process of self-reflection and adjustment.

Conclusion

Something as ordinary as cooking can be a playground for honing essential life skills like routine-building and problem-solving. It’s a space to practice, to reflect, and most importantly, to improve. So the next time you dread life’s ‘mundane’ chores, perhaps try to approach them as an opportunity to cultivate better routines. You may discover a newfound appreciation for the everyday tasks that make up your world.

Happy cooking and happy reflecting!

Until next time.

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The Power of Consistency: One Week of Daily Blogging and the Journey Ahead

Hello to all my wonderful readers,

Having successfully written on this blog every day for a week, I’m feeling increasingly optimistic that this latest endeavor will become a long-term habit. The methodology I employed to get this far isn’t new or complicated; it’s the same advice I’ve been sharing with you in my previous posts. To summarize, I established a clear objective, which in this case was to write a brief blog post each day. I designated a specific time to pursue this writing goal, opting for the early mornings before my day officially begins with breakfast. Lastly, I anchored this new practice to an existing daily routine—finishing my first set of pushups is my trigger to start writing.

Writing a book has always lingered at the periphery of my consciousness, but until now, it remained a vague idea that I’d yet to embrace fully. I would wait for that elusive ‘perfect’ concept to strike me like a bolt of lightning. I don’t know if such a perfect idea is even a reality. Still, my ongoing recovery journey since experiencing a stroke seems like a fitting subject to delve into for the time being. While I might venture into fiction at some later stage, the habit I’m nurturing now will undoubtedly help any future writing projects.

On this subject, one author I particularly admire is Brandon Sanderson. He is often generous with his wisdom for those looking to become writers, and one piece of advice from him strikes a chord with me. His counsel is straightforward but effective: write and do it consistently. The emphasis isn’t necessarily on the volume of words but on the practice’s regularity. Even if it’s a modest 200 words daily, the results will accumulate over time, and before you know it, you could be sitting on an entire book series or more. This principle mirrors the philosophy I’ve tried to incorporate into achieving all my life goals: Start small, maintain consistency, and the results will follow.

I look forward to seeing where this new habit takes me. Not only is it providing a platform for me to share my ongoing life experiences, but it’s also laying the foundation for potential future literary endeavors. So, whether you’re an aspiring writer or have other goals you want to pursue, remember this: Start, even if it’s with something small, but keep at it regularly. After all, the journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.

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The Art of Ritualistic Routines: How Mental Tricks Add Value to Daily Tasks

A Mental trick I use to help me take all of the decided-upon steps of a routine is to think of it as a ritual. This is aided by the inclusion of additional behaviors that are primarily superficial. 

While creating these rituals may make some tasks more complicated than necessary, I find that when I complete a routine precisely as intended, I feel more of a sense of accomplishment. As I said, this is purely a mental trick I use and, aside from the additional feelings of accomplishment, adds very little of use to the routine, but it also costs extremely little.

An example of this is my drying off routine when I finish showering. It begins with turning my left foot toward the shower head and drying off my face, then I turn my right foot, dry my hair, and mentally count 1. Each step involves rotating a foot, 1/8th of a turn, and counting upward. Next, I dry my arms. Left inside, then outside, Right inside and out. I dry my back on the 5th count/ foot rotation, and the 6th is my buttocks. 7th, I dry my left leg and then my right leg. On counts 9 and 10, I pat dry my face and hair a final time before hanging my towel up on count 11. On count 12, I step out of the shower and dress myself. My counting continues through this process, and if I do it right, it ends at 20 when I step into my right slipper.  

I know that facing specific directions and counting is unnecessary, but it feels right to do it that way. It also ensures that I complete all steps, which could be annoying, even though it’s not very likely to happen. Most of my rituals come naturally after I notice that I do things in a certain way. Only after thinking about the process do I decide if that’s the best way to do things. Sometimes, a budding ritual might need to be tweaked a little to make it fit with a count better or to align with something else.

You might fall into rituals as you form longer routines, and I encourage you to adopt them intentionally. They cost exceptionally little and may add some additional satisfaction to their completion.

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The Power of Routine: A Personal Journey of Supporting a Loved One

Hello, Dear readers,

After experiencing a stroke and losing my job, I made a heartfelt commitment to support my wife in any way I could. She transitioned into the role of the primary earner for our small household, excelling in her work far beyond the call of duty. Her hard work has not gone unnoticed; she’s earned numerous corporate awards and sees significant raises nearly yearly. Given her dedication, I make it a point to shoulder any chores or tasks she might otherwise feel obligated to do. This decision has allowed me to hone habit formation and routine building.

While I still need to fill my week with tasks, the possibility looms. There might come a day when I have to scale back or adjust my routine, perhaps rotating some monthly chores instead of tackling them weekly. I recently had an affirming moment when I returned from a week-long vacation with my sisters. My wife exclaimed those certain chores had gone undone in my absence. Although she managed to cover most bases, routine tasks awaited me. I saw this as a triumph, indicating that my efforts lighten her load. My system successfully achieves its intended purpose, which is as much as one can hope for.

Periodic evaluation of my routines is crucial. I need to assess whether they align with their intended goals or if some need to be modified or scrapped. This doesn’t require constant attention but should be an annual exercise. Over the past few years, my wife and I have discussed our significant goals for the coming 12 months around the New Year. This reflective moment is an excellent opportunity to review the efficacy of my established routines and habits.

Thank you for joining me on this journey, and I hope my experiences offer you some valuable insights into the importance of thoughtful habit formation.

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Two Proven Methods for Identifying Habits You Actually Need

Hello Dear Readers,

One of the challenges in establishing good habits is figuring out which practices you need. There are many strategies to spot these gaps in your life, and I’ve tried a few. Today, I want to share two methods that have worked well for me.

The first approach is straightforward: pay attention to your immediate environment. Look for tasks, especially repetitive chores, that need doing. Once you’ve identified an assignment, the next step is to decide how often it needs to be done.

Sometimes, determining the frequency is easy because experts have already provided recommendations. Take, for example, the air filters in our HVAC system. I talked to our HVAC technician about routine maintenance to extend the life of our heater and AC. He recommended changing the air filters monthly. Based on his advice, we set up a recurring Amazon order for inexpensive air filters. I also created a monthly reminder on my phone.

There are times, however, when you have to determine the frequency yourself. In such cases, you might need to revisit and adjust the interval to fit your life circumstances better.

The second method I use for identifying habits involves listening to those around me. Specifically, it grabs my attention if I hear my wife or anyone else complain about the same thing three times. I consider whether it’s something I can take action on. Using this approach, I’ve established some beneficial habits. For instance, I’ve gotten into cleaning our cat’s litter box, scrubbing our toilets, and calling my parents more regularly.

These strategies help you identify gaps in your routine. Building a complete set of habits is a gradual process. It’s usually better to let them accumulate over time rather than trying to establish them all at once.