Tag: Goal Setting

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The Power of Routine: A Personal Journey of Supporting a Loved One

Hello, Dear readers,

After experiencing a stroke and losing my job, I made a heartfelt commitment to support my wife in any way I could. She transitioned into the role of the primary earner for our small household, excelling in her work far beyond the call of duty. Her hard work has not gone unnoticed; she’s earned numerous corporate awards and sees significant raises nearly yearly. Given her dedication, I make it a point to shoulder any chores or tasks she might otherwise feel obligated to do. This decision has allowed me to hone habit formation and routine building.

While I still need to fill my week with tasks, the possibility looms. There might come a day when I have to scale back or adjust my routine, perhaps rotating some monthly chores instead of tackling them weekly. I recently had an affirming moment when I returned from a week-long vacation with my sisters. My wife exclaimed those certain chores had gone undone in my absence. Although she managed to cover most bases, routine tasks awaited me. I saw this as a triumph, indicating that my efforts lighten her load. My system successfully achieves its intended purpose, which is as much as one can hope for.

Periodic evaluation of my routines is crucial. I need to assess whether they align with their intended goals or if some need to be modified or scrapped. This doesn’t require constant attention but should be an annual exercise. Over the past few years, my wife and I have discussed our significant goals for the coming 12 months around the New Year. This reflective moment is an excellent opportunity to review the efficacy of my established routines and habits.

Thank you for joining me on this journey, and I hope my experiences offer you some valuable insights into the importance of thoughtful habit formation.

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Goal-Setting 101: How to Use Rules and Triggers for Habit Building

t helps to determine rules and triggers to develop and maintain your habits. As with my running goal last year, I knew that sometimes events would conspire against me being able to meet my 35k per week goal. As such, I needed to determine some rules to play by. I had to ensure that my rules supported my plan rather than excuses I could fall back on. The first step I took in crafting my rules was to investigate what my goal was.

 

My goal was to run 35k per week, but I wanted to regain mobility endurance and support my health. Recognizing these as my real goals helped me create appropriate rules. For example, one of my rules is that I will not run if there is snow/ice on the ground. This rule would conflict if my true goal were the 35k per week. However, since my true goal is mobility, doing something that has a substantial risk of decreasing my mobility via a broken ankle from slipping/falling is counterproductive.

I tested all of my potential rules against my goals in this manner. Setting up rules like this is crucial because otherwise, I would be relying on Ad Hoc decisions, which are too easily influenced by current emotions.

As much as I wanted to achieve my actual goals and that I became focused on reaching 35k each week, there were plenty of days when I dreaded running, and it took great effort to force myself to go out. If I had not established a strict running schedule on Monday, Wednesday, Friday, and Saturday, I probably would have made excuses and failed to achieve my goal by missing too many days.

The other half of this equation is setting up triggers. Triggers are events or times that prompt a response or when to apply a rule. Every run day, my trigger for getting ready for running is after I use the bathroom. Every morning, after breakfast and coffee, I’ll eventually have to use the toilet; I use this as my trigger for running. After I use the bathroom, I change into my running clothes instead of returning to my computer. My no running on snow ice rule is triggered by looking out the front door when I get my second cup of coffee. If there’s snow/ice visible on my ground now, I cancel my run.

So when trying to develop your habits, First figure out your actual goals and test your habit ideas against your real goals. Second, build your ruleset so you’re not relying on feelings or motivation, and be strict with your rules. Don’t give yourself any excuses for ignoring your rules. You might need to create a new rule if you can’t do the desired behavior. Just ensure you test this new rule against your goals. Finally, make your triggers. Use alarms on your phone if you can’t find commonly occurring events.