Written 5/2
Hello Dear Readers,
Last evening unfolded with a most unusual occurrence. As usual, I retired for the night at our standard bedtime. The evening routine was methodical, almost mechanical, in its execution—a necessary ritual since the stroke that urged a restructuring of my daily habits. But at 2:00 AM, I awoke to find myself standing in our bathroom, bewildered and piecing together fragments of memory that suggested I had been elsewhere in the house mere moments ago.
The sensation was disorienting. Had I neglected my bedtime rituals? The usual checklist ran through my mind in a haze. Did I remember to brush my teeth? A rush of confusion overwhelmed me as though a veil had been draped over my memories. Soon, a small but significant discovery alleviated one of my concerns: I was wearing my mouthguard. This small cue hinted at the likelihood that I had completed at least part of my nightly regimen.
This practice of linking tasks, a method instilled by my occupational therapist post-stroke, has been a lifeline. It involves a simple chain of nighttime preparations: laying out sleepwear, setting aside clothes for the following day, brushing teeth, and finally, the mouthguard. Each step is meticulously planned to ensure everything is remembered.
However, the mystery deepened as I questioned whether I had managed other essential evening tasks. Had I taken my medication? Was the programmable coffee pot set for the morning? Driven by a need for reassurance, I checked both. They were in order, to my relief, yet this brought little comfort against the nagging confusion that clouded my mind.
In my semi-awake state, I grappled with two possibilities. First, I had been sleepwalking, wandering about the house in a nocturnal haze until a flicker of awareness returned in the bathroom. The alternative was perhaps even more bizarre—a vivid dream in which I moved through familiar spaces in our home, only to awaken when I reached the bathroom.
Each theory seemed plausible yet left much unexplained. As I slipped back into bed, careful not to disturb my sleeping wife, the strangeness of the night’s events hung heavily in the air. The experience was perplexing, to say the least. I lay there, a mix of concern and curiosity stirring within, pondering the depths of the human mind and its mysterious workings during the hours meant for rest.
Regardless of the proper explanation, the event poignantly reminded me of the complexities introduced by my health condition. The mechanisms I had put in place to safeguard against forgetfulness had held up. Yet, the unexpected venture into the night showed that surprises lurk even in well-planned routines.
As dawn approached, with the first hints of morning light filtering through our curtains, I found solace in the normalcy that daylight brought. Yet, the night’s journey left a lasting impression, a reminder of the delicate balance we maintain as we navigate the challenges that life and health cast in our path.