Tag: brain stroke recovery

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The Mysterious Case of My Monday Weight That Didn’t Move

Brian’s fitness journal after a brain stroke

After my run today, I stepped on the scale expecting the usual Monday plot twist—only to find that my weight and body composition hadn’t changed since Saturday. This was deeply suspicious.

For the past several weeks, Monday has reliably been my heaviest day of the week. I’ve learned not to take it personally. I usually blame the weekend—and more specifically, pizza. Delicious, sourdough-based, entirely worth it pizza.

My kidneys, however, do not behave like those of a perfectly cooperative adult. Depending on what I eat, my body becomes very enthusiastic about holding onto water. Most days, we eat healthy, homemade meals. Pizza is strictly a once-a-week luxury. Still, every Sunday I make sure pizza happens. Every Monday, my weight usually responds accordingly—thanks to a combination of glycogen storage and water retention.

So today’s unchanged number was unexpected.

I generally try not to obsess over my weight. It can swing by a few pounds easily, and I’ve learned not to panic. This past weekend, I ate exactly as I usually do. My exercise routine was also mostly unchanged—except for a peaceful three-kilometer walk with my wife on Sunday. The weather was lovely, and she wanted some sunshine. I wouldn’t expect that walk to single-handedly rewrite my Monday numbers, but I can’t think of any other explanation either.

I track my weight alongside my other biometrics because my nephrologist uses these trends to monitor my overall health. When we meet, he checks for sudden changes in weight, blood pressure, or heart rate. His rule of thumb is simple: sharp shifts usually mean something is going on inside the body.

Since I’m less active now than I was in the summer, I actually expected maintaining my weight to become easier. But because I move less in winter, I’ve also cut back on snacks. With kidney disease, almost everything seems to contain something I’m supposed to limit—phosphate, sugar, potassium, salt. Sometimes avoiding food altogether feels like the safest strategy.

Because my weight usually fluctuates more than this, today’s stability caught me off guard. At the same time, it means I need to be more careful this week. Starting lower than usual raises the risk of losing muscle too quickly—and that’s something my doctor very much does not want.

So for now, I’ll watch the numbers, eat carefully, move thoughtfully, and let the scale do its strange little science experiment in peace.

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Early Wake-Ups, Asian Groceries, and a Very Organized Saturday

Brian’s fitness journal after a brain stroke

Today’s plan was simple: visit the Asian grocery store and then pick up flea medication for our kitten on the way home. Both places open at 8:00 a.m., which left me with that uniquely uncomfortable block of time between my normal wake-up time and when departure is actually allowed. It is because I have a long list of a Saturday morning routine.

I usually wake around 7 a.m. I need more sleep than my wife—about 7.5 to 8 hours—thanks to a brain injury that politely requires extra rest. One doctor told me I’d need it. An occupational therapist told me to keep a consistent schedule. So now I live in a delicate alliance with both science and my alarm clock.

My wife, on the other hand, operates like a Swiss watch. Saturdays do not alter her internal firmware. She wakes up roughly two hours earlier than I do, workday or not. She says it’s because her brain works best when her schedule is regulated. I believe her. I also fear her efficiency.

This left me with too much time to do nothing… but not quite enough time to comfortably start my usual full Saturday morning routine.

Fortunately, my wife, our kitten, and my bladder formed a secret alliance and woke me up an hour early. I briefly considered going back to sleep. Then I remembered that future-me would be grateful if present-me used the bonus hour wisely. So I stayed up.

Our kitten, as always, was thrilled. She waits patiently on the bed every morning until I open my eyes—sometimes even dragging her beloved toy mouse with her. I’ve been hiding that toy before bedtime because otherwise she launches nighttime solo parkour sessions and loses it somewhere in the house. This morning, she didn’t need the toy. She already had me. Her happiness upon my awakening was… overwhelming.

I fed the kitten, poured my cereal, completed my texting and language-app practice, and even finished my morning exercises. And just like that, I had less than thirty minutes before departure—perfect timing to work on this post.

It turns out doing part of my routine before the grocery run is surprisingly satisfying. That’s one less task waiting for me when I return home.

So thanks to Artemis, my wife, and my kidneys, my day already feels strangely coordinated.

Once we return, I’ll prep for my weekly 10K run, cook supper, and then head out again for our regular grocery trip. I sincerely hope my wife’s perfectly structured day forgives the extra logistics.

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Three Bags of Leaves and the Stubborn Tree That Won’t Quit

Brian’s fitness journal after a brain stroke

I scheduled today as an official Leaf Day. The morning was cool, but the forecast promised warmth later, which meant it was finally safe to commit to the mission. With determination (and mild dread), I headed outside to clear our lawn of fallen leaves.

Recent windy days had turned our trees into enthusiastic confetti machines. Naturally, every single leaf seemed to land in our front yard. We try to keep things tidy, but I skipped this chore on Tuesday—and leaves, like unread emails, multiply when ignored. Some of our neighbors let their yards turn into a brown carpet museum, but we live under the cheerful supervision of an HOA, where “neatly maintained” is not a suggestion but a lifestyle.

I confidently assumed this would be a one-bag job.

It was not.

One bag became two. Two became three. At that point, I began to question both my math skills and my life choices. I had cleared the yard just last week, so the sheer volume of leaves felt borderline disrespectful. It took a few solid hours to finish, but thankfully, it was still nowhere near the level of suffering known as summer lawn mowing.

Despite the surprise workload, the chore was strangely satisfying. With every pass of the leaf vacuum, the front yard visibly transformed from “abandoned forest floor” to “suburban responsibility.” After emptying the third bag, I finally stopped—mostly because my motivation had also reached full capacity. The yard looked noticeably neater, and I felt just proud enough to justify a future complaint about it.

For reasons known only to nature, the tree in our front yard still hasn’t finished shedding its leaves, while the neighbor’s tree is nearly bald. An arborist once told us our tree is weakened by its much larger neighbor and suggested we remove it. That suggestion was immediately vetoed by my wife, who has a deep sentimental attachment to trees.

A few years ago, we had to remove a massive tree behind our house because it was threatening the structure itself. It was so tall that owls used to visit it at night—often waking my wife around 2 a.m. with dramatic hooting. Even our kitten loved leaping from branch to branch. Cutting that tree was emotionally difficult, which is why the front-yard tree still stands today… heroically dropping leaves every autumn.

I powered through the task and completed it to my own satisfaction. Living at the bottom of a hill means we naturally collect more than our fair share of wind-blown leaves—especially near the storm gutter, which today was completely buried under a dense mat of leafy ambition.

Three bags. One stubborn tree. Zero regrets.
Well… maybe mild regret.
But the yard is clean.

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When Snow Is on the Schedule but Motivation Is on Hold

Brian’s fitness journal after a brain stroke

Last night, I made the mistake of checking the weather forecast. There it was in bold, unforgiving clarity: snow scheduled for today. I don’t mind running in the cold, but snow running? That’s where my enthusiasm politely exits the building.

This morning, the very first thing I did was rush to the window like a weather detective. No snow yet. Victory—for the moment. The temperature had dropped, though, and it was barely going to crawl past 40°F all day.

We’ve had a suspiciously mild autumn this year. Just recently, we enjoyed a 70-degree day. I think that spoiled me. Cold now feels rude. Still, I reminded myself: at least it’s not snowing. Our neighborhood is hilly, and I vividly remember my wife and I nearly slipping just walking up the hill in front of our house on a previous snow day. Ice plus gravity is not a friendly combination.

Had it been snowing, the day’s running plans would have been instantly canceled—no debate. But since the ground was still clear, I was forced to consider actually going out into the cold. I wasn’t thrilled, but I figured that after breakfast, it might be slightly more tolerable.

Meanwhile, my wife casually goes out for exercise at 5:00 a.m., when the temperature is even lower. I still don’t understand what kind of heroic software runs her internal system.

I, on the other hand, require mental push-ups just to step outside in cold weather.

After feeding both my kitten and myself, I consulted my weather app for the optimal escape window—only to be informed that snow was still very much expected. The app cheerfully announced it would start within the hour. In other words, science had just handed me a perfectly legitimate excuse to make my run short.

And I accepted it without protest.

The exercise journey, I’m learning, is full of negotiations—with weather, with the body, and especially with the mind. A decade ago, my resistance to running was far worse. Now the resistance is mostly emotional… but I still show up more often than not.

Even a little bit of exercise counts. Even showing up mentally counts. And looking ahead at the week, both Wednesday and Friday promise better running weather—so I’m choosing not to feel too guilty today.

Sometimes progress means running.
Sometimes it means strategically retreating from snow.

Both are survival skills.

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Sunday Waffles Breakfast with Secret Jam

Brian’s fitness journal after a brain stroke

This morning, my wife asked me to make waffles. She had been drawing pancakes and suddenly decided she wanted to eat something fluffy. I, being a reasonable adult with access to a waffle maker, I accepted the mission.

So I woke up earlier than usual—early enough to sneak into the morning before my wife completed her full non-working-day routine. On her days off, she transforms into a productivity machine. One of her regular Sunday rituals is sorting ingredients for the entire upcoming week.

She plans a full weekly menu and pre-packs the ingredients into labeled bags. Monday’s bag equals Monday’s meal. It’s brilliant. It reduces waste, prevents impulse grocery shopping, and makes cooking so easy that even I rarely mess it up. The only problem? This operation completely occupies our very small kitchen.

So I waited.

Patiently.
Hungrily.
Strategically.

Once she completed her meal-kit assembly line and stepped away from the counter, I made my move and claimed the kitchen.

Our waffle maker is nearly two decades old and still performs beautifully, like a seasoned breakfast veteran. When we first moved to Tennessee, we made waffles almost every Sunday—until we realized that frequent waffles come with frequent weight gain. Since then, waffles have become a rare and highly celebrated event.

Today was one of those special days.

I sliced up some strawberries that were right at the edge of their peak deliciousness and made us two waffles each. Unfortunately, I had wildly miscalculated the strawberry-to-waffle ratio. Just as disaster loomed, my wife calmly produced a jar of strawberry jam she had made last spring—homemade, of course.

She’s created three varieties of strawberry jam in the past, including a spicy version. Sadly, I had already devoured all the spicy ones during the summer. What remained was the classic strawberry—and it saved breakfast.

After waffles and our weekly “fancy” coffee, the day drifted peacefully until lunchtime. As is now tradition, I offered to make my wife an omelet. She accepted immediately and requested two eggs instead of the usual one.

She’s been working hard on her strength training and trying to keep her protein intake high to protect her muscle mass. I took this as both a nutritional assignment and an honor.

It was one of those rare days with waffles, homemade jam, careful routines, and quiet teamwork in a small kitchen. Nothing dramatic. Nothing rushed.

Just a very pleasant Sunday.

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Shorts Weather, Long Distance, and a 10K Victory

Brian’s fitness journal after a brain stroke

Today’s mission depended on one critical variable: temperature. I waited patiently for it to rise just enough to justify running in shorts—quite possibly my final bare-legged appearance of the year. Once conditions were approved by the unofficial weather committee (me), I headed out for my 10K run with one ambitious goal in mind: hit my final speed target for the year.

The last two runs were hard 5Ks, and I’d pushed aggressively for pace. Somehow, my body had recovered better than expected, which gave me hope. Dangerous hope. The motivational kind.

After the first quarter kilometer, I was well ahead of target. That early success flipped a switch in my brain: Maintain this at all costs. Each pace announcement reinforced the fantasy that today might actually be the day. Naturally, I pushed harder.

Now, the body is essentially an energy budget. Spend too much too early, and you go bankrupt before the finish line. I knew I was overspending. By the end of the first kilometer, my head start had shrunk—but I was still safely ahead, so I continued the dangerous strategy known as optimism. By the 5K mark, I had beaten my target pace by a comfortable margin.

But I wasn’t content with “comfortable.”

I wanted a new personal best 10K.
I wanted my first ever sub-9-minute-per-kilometer 10K.
And I still had half the distance left to survive.

The final two kilometers were brutal. My lead evaporated faster than my confidence during those last pushes. Every step felt like a negotiation. With three seconds to spare—three—I crossed the line under my sub-9 goal.

I did it.
New personal best.
Goal achieved.
Shorts weather honored.

For a brief moment, I considered retiring for the rest of the year. After all, it’s still early November. Why not celebrate with a well-earned vacation from running? That thought lasted exactly as long as the walk home.

Instead, I doubled down.

Next year’s goal is already on the table: shave off another full minute from my pace. Is it realistic? I honestly don’t know. But it’s achievable to try—and that’s the part that still matters most.

So on Monday, the next mission begins.

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When Muscles Protest but Motivation Wins the Argument

Brian’s fitness journal after a brain stroke

Today, I fully expected to fail my target pace before I even tied my running shoes. My legs were still filing formal complaints from yesterday’s effort—the direct result of pushing hard for that shiny new personal best the other day. Consecutive personal bests are a bold request of the universe, and I had already braced myself for disappointment. Pre-disappointment, if you will.

And yet… the goal refused to leave my head.

The first pace announcement came in, and to my surprise, I was slightly ahead of target after the first quarter kilometer. That tiny lead was just enough encouragement to make a reckless decision: push harder. Hope is powerful—and occasionally unwise.

For a while, it worked.

Then reality caught up. By the end of the second kilometer, that early lead had completely evaporated. My legs stiffened like they had clocked out early. I tried to push again, but my body had officially entered “no further negotiations” mode. No matter how much I argued with my pace, it refused to come back down.

In the end, I missed my target—but only by about ten seconds. I also logged my eighth-fastest run ever, which is not exactly a tragedy. I was still more than a minute faster than Monday’s run, so overall, progress was very much alive… just not wearing a gold medal today.

Now the focus shifts to recovery. My next run is a 10K, not a 5K, and that’s a different kind of negotiation altogether. Pace management over 10 kilometers is much trickier—start too fast, and the second half will collect its revenge with interest. I’ve been running for nearly a decade, and yet I still struggle with pacing like it’s a lifelong riddle.

My body condition and temperature affect my running more than I’d like to admit. Recovery is especially tricky with my kidney condition. Even after a few days of rest, it’s not unusual for my body to feel like it hasn’t fully recharged. The last two sessions were particularly hard pushes, so caution is now my training partner. I may not be improving at the speed I imagine in my head—but I am moving forward. And more importantly, I still have something to run toward. These days, the hope matters more than the stopwatch. Performance fades. Motivation, when treated kindly, sticks around.

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Warm Weather, Fast Legs, and a New Personal Best

Brian’s fitness journal after a brain stroke

As forecast, today’s weather finally decided to be kind. After nearly a week of cold and rainy misery, I was able to run in shorts again—which, this time of year, feels like winning the fitness lottery. I waited out a brief cool morning delay, and then I was off. Pure luxury.

There are fewer than two months left in the year now. I’ve already hit my original year-end running goals, so naturally, I moved the finish line. Running, after all, is highly negotiable with the weather. Temperature rules everything: my pace, my motivation, and occasionally my mood. The last few cold days were rough, and hitting my target pace felt like negotiating with gravity.

But when I checked today’s forecast, I knew. Today is the day.

And my body agreed.

From the first kilometer, everything felt smoother—lighter, faster, less like I was dragging winter behind me. My running app announced my pace each kilometer like a tiny motivational coach. Each update sounded better than the last. By the end, my target pace had dropped to just under 9 minutes per kilometer. Not only did I beat my target—I crushed it. I even set a new personal best, running more than a full minute faster than my run just two days ago.

Weather is powerful. But on my cooldown walk home, curiosity kicked in. Why was today so much better?

Then it hit me—I was also a pound lighter than I was on Monday. Add in less water weight, and suddenly I was carrying about two pounds less than my last run. And while two pounds doesn’t sound dramatic, try hauling it around for five kilometers and see how heroic you feel.

Between the warmer temperatures, time-change recovery, and lighter load, everything lined up perfectly.

My last running goal for the year is simple but stubborn: finish a 10K at under 9 minutes per kilometer. I only attempt a 10K once a week, so the weather still holds all the bargaining power. A cold or rainy day can turn that goal into a negotiation with reality.

Still, I haven’t given up. There are nearly two months left in the year—and at least a few more warm days hiding in the forecast. Somewhere out there, my next breakthrough is waiting, probably wearing shorts.

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A Chilly Fall Chore and a Surprise Yard Visitor in Nashville

Brian’s fitness journal after a brain stroke

Today’s primary objective: leaf collection. Also known as the annual reminder that trees never clean up after themselves. Fall yard work in Nashville can be challenging since we never know what the weather will be like.

We have two enormous trees in the front yard—well, one is technically the neighbor’s tree, but its leaves have firmly pledged allegiance to our property. Since our house sits at the very end of the court, we also receive a generous donation of leaves from the surrounding yards. I like to think of it as a natural tax for living at the bottom of the hill.

For this noble task, we use a leaf vacuum. My wife tried it the other day and immediately announced it was heavy. I wouldn’t call it heavy… but after a few hours, it does begin to feel like you’re dragging around a small, stubborn elephant. Still, I try to keep our front yard as leafless as possible. It’s part pride, part stubbornness, part denial about how wind works.

Fall in Nashville is a game of weather roulette. Rain pops in whenever it feels like being dramatic, so timing outdoor work requires strategy. This morning was dry—but brutally chilly, with wind that felt personally offended by my existence. I waited until early afternoon, when the temperature finally decided to show mercy, and then I went out to tackle the day’s biggest chore.

After a few solid hours of vacuuming, blowing, and questioning my life decisions, the yard was almost clear. I was just about to celebrate when I spotted a surprise guest: a small snake gracefully slithering across our gravel patch like it had scheduled an appointment.

Of course, I wanted photographic proof. I pulled out my phone to show my wife and family. The snake, however, had zero interest in becoming an internet celebrity. By the time my camera was ready, it vanished—clearly a professional at avoiding publicity.

That led to the inevitable follow-up: What kind of snake was it? A quick round of online detective work (powered by memory and mild adrenaline) suggested it was most likely a common garter snake.

I was surprised to see a snake this time of year. Last fall, we had a small one in our garage too. My wife tried to photograph that one as well. Same result—instant disappearance. Sadly, a sudden cold spell wasn’t kind to that little visitor, and we found it a few days later.

The good news is that common garter snakes in Tennessee are harmless. Their coloring varies, but most have three light stripes running down their bodies. They’re active in spring and fall and hibernate during winter—so today’s snake was probably doing exactly what I did: waiting for the afternoon warmth before venturing out.

So yes, today was leaf duty, cold air, and a surprise wildlife encounter—all part of the deluxe Nashville fall experience. Apparently, when you clean your yard, nature occasionally sends you a live bonus feature.

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Time Change Chaos and a Kitten Boss

Brian’s fitness journal after a brain stroke

Time change season is here again—the biannual ritual where humans pretend one hour is no big deal, while our biological clocks absolutely disagree. My wife and I both struggle with it. She even started adjusting a day early, as if easing into jet lag without the benefit of a vacation. Neither of us grew up with daylight savings—Japan doesn’t use it, and I once lived in a part of the U.S. where clocks remain blissfully untouched—so after decades, it still feels unnatural.

I work from home and live by my own schedule, so waking up early or late doesn’t cause any major disasters. Still, I like to keep my time consistent—mostly because my wife has a strict work routine, and I want to stay synchronized for the sake of household harmony. I allow myself just enough flexibility to keep life interesting.

This morning, however, my alarm dragged me out of sleep far too early. I remembered the time change and thought smugly, “I’ll just sleep in a little longer.” Unfortunately, this plan was immediately vetoed by our kitten, who stomped upstairs like a tiny furry manager, dropped her toy mouse onto my chest, and demanded a meeting.

My wife had already fed her hours earlier—she wakes up long before I do in order to exercise and prepare for work. Usually, once the kitten eats, she either curls back up beside me or disappears to find trouble somewhere else. But today? She wanted the morning shift on my schedule. And she wanted it now.

So Our Kitten

Ignoring her is not an option. When I try, she escalates the situation by repeatedly dropping the toy mouse onto me with the precision of a trained negotiator. Eventually, I surrendered. I dragged myself out of bed, fixed breakfast, and went downstairs for my mandatory “fetch with mouse toy” session. She observed my compliance with great satisfaction.

Honestly, she’s not the worst alarm clock. She’s on time, persistent, and offers plenty of accountability—whether I asked for it or not. And on days when I want to get a lot done, having a tiny, determined supervisor staring at me actually helps.

She is my new boss. And she’s learning her rights very quickly.

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