Tag: brain stroke recovery

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A Day of Small Chaos and Sweet Rewards

Brian’s fitness journal after a brain stroke

I woke up this morning to the gentle sound of rain tapping on the window—nature’s way of saying, “Good morning, here’s a free car wash for your soul.” My wife informed me that earlier, it had been raining so hard that she abandoned her morning workout. This is shocking because she usually treats her exercise routine with the seriousness of a NASA launch checklist. If she skips, something dramatic has happened. And yes—when I peeked outside, I understood. It was cold, gloomy, and the kind of rain that makes even Halloween candy nervous.

Today was also my “second attempt” at a dentist appointment—because I completely missed the first one. (If Forgetfulness were an Olympic sport, I’d have a medal by now.) My wife kindly offered to drive me, even though the clinic is within walking distance, but my weather app swore on its digital life that the rain would stop. And for once, it didn’t lie. Several hours later, the rain paused, and I set off on foot.

I told my wife I didn’t need the ride, and since she was on a work call, I quietly snuck out of the house like a teenager breaking curfew—except I was headed to get my teeth cleaned, not to a party.

The appointment went smoothly, but as soon as I stepped outside, the sky decided to rejoin the conversation. It started raining again on my way home. This was inconvenient, because my grand plan was to run right after the dentist. My schedule was already wobbling like a badly balanced washing machine, so I knew I had to get home and sprint back out immediately.

Luckily, the rain downgraded itself from “dramatic monologue” to “occasional sprinkle.” Still, it was cold enough to remind me it is indeed autumn. After 30 minutes of running in this half-rain, half-air situation, I was soaked, chilled, and squinting through water-speckled glasses, which is perhaps the least aerodynamic condition imaginable. I didn’t hit my target pace, but I was close enough to blame it on meteorology with dignity.

Now, here’s the best part: every time I go to the dentist, I treat myself to a cupcake from the bakery nearby. Tradition is important, after all. I asked my wife if she wanted one, but she declined—as she usually does. She does not share my passionate, borderline-philosophical relationship with sweets. Her loss, I say. I thought about that cupcake during my entire run like it was the Holy Grail. And yes—I ate it after my shower, and it was spectacular.

One dentist appointment down. Another one set—six months from now. This time, I saved it in my Google Calendar with enough alerts to wake the dead. May I never miss it again.

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Lesson Learned from Missed a Dentist Appointment

Brian’s fitness journal after a brain stroke

Today, I had a dentist appointment—emphasis on had. As in: it existed, it was scheduled, it was on my Google Calendar, it came with not one but two automated reminders… and yet somehow my brain decided to treat it like deleted spam. The dentist’s office called asking where I was, and I had the audacity to be surprised.

I apologized profusely, of course. Thankfully, they squeezed me in for tomorrow. Pure luck. I still remember when my wife had to reschedule once because of a last-minute work emergency—she waited ages for a new slot, partly because she’s extremely particular about her appointment times. Early morning only. Never the first several days of any month, end of the month, quarter-end, year-end, or audit days. Her calendar has more rules than the IRS handbook.

Meanwhile, I’m flexible. If the dentist said, “We have a 3:17 p.m. slot behind the storage closet,” I would simply say, “Great, see you then.”

What Made Me To Miss The Appointment

Still, I’m annoyed with myself. Missing medical appointments is no small thing—especially when doctors plan their schedules months in advance. We book our dental visits six months out for a reason, not because I enjoy committing to events half a year before I know what my face will look like.

After my brain stroke and the possibility of a kidney transplant came up, my doctor told me to keep every tooth in perfect shape—no cavities, no surprises. So for the last decade, I’ve treated my mouth like a priceless museum artifact.

One of the reasons we chose our current home was that the dentist (and my other doctors) are within walking distance. My wife made sure of that. She wanted me to be able to walk over anytime something unusual happened—loose retainer, chipped tooth, mysterious twinge—without relying on Uber or coordinating schedules. I love that freedom more than I care to admit.

And that’s why missing today’s appointment felt unacceptable. I pride myself on keeping things under control, and yet my brain decided to take a personal day.

Next To Do Action

So tomorrow, I’ll walk to the dentist just after noon, reshuffle my entire schedule, and run later in the day. I checked the weather—it might rain, but at least the temperature looks friendly. If nothing else, this whole ordeal taught me one thing: I need a better reminder system… or maybe a personal assistant whose only job is to drag me to medical appointments.

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Why Breaking My Routine Made Me a Stronger Runner

Brian’s fitness journal after a brain stroke

I used to do resistance training the chaotic way—every body part, every day, every time. Basically, the “if I train everything, something has to improve… right?” strategy. Then my wife gently pointed out that muscles need rest, variety, and apparently not a daily existential crisis.

She was right, of course. Summer proved that. Between mowing, trimming, leaf wrangling, and whatever mysterious outdoor chores magically appear when the weather is warm, I barely had energy for running—much less full-body resistance training every single day. So, I surrendered. I broke the routine into sections like a civilized human being.

Now I rotate muscle groups throughout the week, giving each part its moment to shine (and suffer). Some areas get a twice-a-week spotlight; others politely wait their turn. Suddenly, life is manageable again—chores, running, and training all coexist instead of staging a coup.

Today was the start of a new week, which means pull-up day.

A sacred day.
A day of decisions.

Should I plateau at 10 pull-ups, a number respectable enough to put me in the “not bad at all” category? Or should I chase 11, knowing that someday my body will politely inform me, “This is your limit, sir”? Since I haven’t reached that point yet, I went for it. Eleven. Next week, twelve. After that… we’ll see. One day, gravity may win. But not today.

After conquering the pull-up bar and demolishing breakfast, I got ready for my run. The temperature, however, had other plans. Today’s forecast: “Cold. No reprieve. Wear pants.” My body does not negotiate well with sudden temperature changes, so I usually wait for the warmest part of the day in winter—just as I run early in summer to avoid roasting like a forgotten croissant.

But since the temperature was stubbornly staying in “absolutely not shorts” territory, I layered up: long sleeves, full-length pants, the whole winter runner look. Forty-five minutes later, I hit the pavement.

And—I beat my target pace.
No new personal record, but I landed the delightful honor of “second fastest ever,” which is basically the silver medal of running days. I’ll take it.

If I hit my target time later this week, I might just set a new record. And that is a very good reason to look forward to the next run… assuming the weather cooperates and my muscles don’t file a formal complaint.

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When Your Run Falls Apart, but Your Progress Doesn’t

Brian’s fitness journal after a brain stroke

Today’s run was… let’s call it “character-building.” On Wednesday, I set a new personal best and thought, “Ah yes, this is who I am now—Speed.” Today, however, my legs politely reminded me that I’m actually more of a seasonal subscription: sometimes fast, sometimes not, and occasionally buffering.

I use a free running app that announces my pace every quarter kilometer. Think of it like a personal pacer—except instead of a cheerful human holding a sign, it’s a disembodied voice that calmly informs me I’m behind… again. I originally set it up because my wife once told me that beginner runners tend to sprint at the start and then collapse like poorly made soufflés. Fair point. So now I let the app dictate a sustainable pace—my own digital pacer, minus the neon outfit.

Usually, the system works—until it doesn’t. By the third kilometer today, I was more than a minute behind my goal. I spent the rest of the run trying to negotiate with my legs like a hostage negotiator. I managed to finish the 5k slightly less behind schedule, but still not close to what I hoped for.

I’ve been running for nearly a decade, so none of this should shock me. Pace goes up, pace goes down—it’s basically the stock market in sneakers. Weather, sleep, body condition, last night’s workout, and whether the universe feels benevolent all factor in.

My kidneys, of course, love to complicate things. With barely 20% function on my last lab test, they’re like coworkers who contribute very little but still demand regular attention. In the summer, my numbers dip even more, and I have to be careful with protein like it’s contraband. One extra hour of outdoor chores can knock my cardio readiness off a cliff. Yet my doctor still encourages me to run, because running keeps my health from slipping further.

Given everything, I try to stay positive. After all, compared to surviving a brain stroke, a slow run is just a slightly dramatic inconvenience. I’m not the fastest runner—not even close—but running has helped me maintain my kidney health and sanity.

Still, disappointment is real. When you’re pushing so hard and don’t get the result you hoped for, it stings. But as I was cooling down, walking home like a Victorian poet contemplating fate, I remembered something important: even on a bad day, I’m faster than I was a year ago, when I was desperately trying to break a 10-minute pace. Progress isn’t a straight line. Sometimes it looks like a toddler’s scribble. Yes, today was slow. But I am faster overall. I am stronger overall. And as long as I keep showing up—even limping slightly—I will keep getting better. One imperfect run at a time.

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A Lesson in Routine and Resetting With One Small Change

Brian’s fitness journal after a brain stroke

Hello Dear Readers,

Today began in a way that completely threw off my usual rhythm. We had planned a trip to the Asian grocery store to pick up some essentials — tofu, fried tofu (aburaage), and miso. We don’t go often, but when we do, it’s serious business. My wife stocks up and preserves everything carefully so it lasts. For her, one grocery trip means the next one to two hours are dedicated to washing, prepping, and storing, which also means she has to rearrange her entire weekly schedule. She plans these things like military operations — I usually know about Asian grocery day a week in advance.

But today, I failed the mission briefing. I overslept. By the time I woke up, it was already the time we were supposed to leave. So I rushed: got dressed, shoveled cereal into my mouth, and skipped my usual morning routine entirely. No planks, no language study, no texting my sisters. All of it postponed until after the grocery run.

This small shift — waking up late — changed the energy of the whole morning. My wife had already finished her entire morning routine before we left, of course. Meanwhile, I felt like I was sprinting from behind the entire day. Still, once we returned home, I told myself: just start. So I began working through my to-do list.

I wanted to run my 10k before the temperature climbed too high, so I pushed some other tasks to later and headed out. Normally, I check my headset while stretching after my plank session — but since I skipped everything, I also skipped the headset check. And just 2 kilometers into the run, my headset battery died. Complete silence.

I pushed through one more kilometer, but imagining another hour of silent running felt like an emotional desert. So, I stopped.

For me, having an audiobook during a run is more than background noise — it keeps me moving, keeps me focused. Without it, everything feels heavier. But despite the rocky morning, I still managed to get my chores done later, just like any other Saturday.

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Running Through The Seasons is How I Reclaimed Strength After Stroke

Brian’s fitness journal after a brain stroke

Written October 15, 2025

Hello, Dear Readers,

This morning, I woke up feeling a little foggy. The air has turned noticeably colder, and lately it’s been harder for my body to bounce back from running and everyday tasks. Sudden temperature shifts have always affected me, but ever since my brain stroke, my autonomic nervous system just… clocks out when the weather changes. If the temperature swings, my body goes, “Nope. That’s enough character development for today.”

So, every morning, I check the weather carefully and layer up like I’m preparing for a small expedition. Over time—and plenty of trial and error—I’ve learned which clothing works for which temperature range. Still, when the seasons shift, my body needs time to adjust. Winter cold and summer heat both make it difficult for me to feel “comfortable” in my own skin.

Over the past few days, I’ve been pushing myself to run a little more because I felt motivated. But this morning, I felt the effort in every muscle. Even so, I headed out the door. And something surprising happened—I ended up hitting my 4th-fastest run time ever, meeting and beating my pace goal. I averaged 9 minutes per kilometer, something I didn’t expect on a tired day. Oddly enough, the fatigue helped me focus. And I was proud.

Now that we’re down to the last few months of the year, I checked in on my annual goals. One of them was logging 1,000 km of running. Thanks to adding a weekly 10km run, I should reach that milestone by the end of October—weeks earlier than last year. Another goal was improving my running pace, and I’ve already accomplished that one.

It still amazes me. Ten years ago, I was relearning how to walk with a walker. Today, I’m running consistently. I’m not the fastest runner out there, but I am improving—steadily, patiently, year after year.

My brain stroke once took away my independence. Regaining my leg mobility felt like reclaiming a part of myself. Every completed run reminds me that I’m capable. Running has become easier over time—not just physically, but emotionally. It’s no longer something I resist; it’s part of my life.

My wife recently read something in a neuroscience journal: One key to forming habits is reducing emotional resistance.

A new habit often feels uncomfortable in the beginning. But when you keep showing up, that discomfort fades. I think my mind and body have finally agreed—running isn’t temporary. It’s home.

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The 2 A.M. Core Confession: My Abs Woke Me Up to Their Potential

Brian’s fitness journal after a brain stroke

Written October 8, 2025

Hello Dear Readers,

Last night, my bladder and abs formed an unholy alliance to drag me out of bed at 2 A.M. I shuffled to the bathroom, realizing that every step reminded me of my “brilliant” idea to double my planking sessions. Who knew maintaining balance while half-asleep could turn into an anatomy lesson? Now I have muscle soreness.

Four hours later, I woke again—this time to my alarm—and poof! The soreness had vanished. My abs, it seems, have mastered the art of the disappearing act. Still, I knew the reason: I’d been quietly upping the ante on my core workouts.

Our trusty planking machine (the second one, because the first one heroically died in service) has become my new favorite torture device. At first, I could barely hold position without feeling like a beached seal, but slowly, rep by rep, I found my rhythm again. Yesterday, I even did two full sessions. Yes, two. My abs have filed an official complaint with muscle soreness.

And it’s not just planks. Push-ups are back on the menu too. I used to do gymnastics, so I don’t mind a little resistance—unlike my wife, who used to treat muscle training like a personal insult. Cardio? She’ll run through a thunderstorm. Dumbbells? She’ll suddenly remember a “pressing” laundry emergency. But recently, she’s warmed up to resistance work—and dare I say—actually enjoying it.

The Way I Create My Goals

I don’t make big, dramatic annual goals. Instead, I chase small, nearly achievable ones, the kind that trick your brain into thinking you’re on vacation instead of a fitness plan. Tracking progress helps, mostly because it keeps me honest when I start slacking off. Sometimes, I have to lower reps; other times, I focus on perfect form. Nothing kills progress faster than sloppy posture—or, worse, an injury.

Unlike my wife, I don’t worship muscle pain, but I do pay attention to it. When it fades, I know it’s time to increase either weight or reps—but never recklessly. Every adjustment means recalibrating my diet too. My biggest challenge? I can’t eat as much protein as a normal adult. It’s a delicate balance: push too hard, and I risk losing muscle instead of building it.

So when I woke up sore this morning, I didn’t complain. I celebrated. It means I pushed just enough. I did about the same ab workout today, so we’ll see if tonight brings another surprise wake-up call from my overachieving core. If it does, I’ll just tell myself—half asleep and half proud—that progress sometimes hurts… and sometimes it wakes you up at 2 A.M.

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How to Be Patient With Rainy Day Leaf Collection

Brian’s fitness journal after a brain stroke

Written October 7, 2025

Hello, Dear Readers,

Today, the weather decided to misbehave—again. After yesterday’s run, I had mentally committed to my next big adventure: Rainy Day leaf collection. It’s the kind of chore that feels noble in theory but suspiciously endless in practice. I even checked the forecast like a responsible adult and saw only a “chance” of early morning rain. Perfect, I thought. I’ll just wait until early afternoon, when the sun peeks out, and get it done.

Instead, I woke up to the sound of a downpour so aggressive it could’ve washed away my motivation. This wasn’t a “light drizzle” situation—it was the kind of steady, unapologetic rain that makes you reconsider your life choices and your roofing. Looking outside, I saw my ambitious leaf plans swirling down the gutter, literally.

This year has been unreasonably rainy—as if Mother Nature subscribed to the “water your lawn… excessively” school of thought. So, it is not uncommon that I need to do rainy day leaf collection. Temperatures have dropped, too, with my wife grumbling that mornings have dipped into the 50s. She’s up early for work, while I, on the other hand, can afford to pick my weather battles. I’d like to call that “flexibility,” though it might also be “strategic procrastination.”

The trees in front of our house have clearly joined the rebellion. They’re producing leaves faster than I can collect them, forming crunchy layers that mock my efforts. The rain, meanwhile, turns those leaves into heavy, sticky mats that cling to the ground like soggy lasagna. I use my leaf vacuum, normally as my trusted companion, but it becomes a glorified paperweight with the wet leaves.

Adding to the comedy, our house sits conveniently at the end of the court—an unfortunate spot where all the neighborhood leaves come to rest. It’s as if every gust of wind plays a game of “let’s dump it on his yard.” I sometimes think my trees are innocent; it’s everyone else’s that are plotting against me.

After days of rain delays, the leaves have piled up so much that I could probably lose a small pet in there. The irony? The rain doesn’t stop the trees from shedding more. It’s like the universe saying, “Oh, you’re behind? Let’s make it worse.”

Still, I try to look on the bright side—

Still, I try to look on the bright side—or at least the dry side. The forecast says Thursday will finally clear up. If it does, I’ll be out there with my vacuum and rake, reclaiming my yard one soggy pile at a time. I like to think of this as a test of patience and persistence—kind of like gardening, but with less zen and more muttering under your breath.

Diligence really is the secret weapon with chores like this. You show up, even when the sky looks like it’s about to ruin your plans. Maybe that’s the quiet lesson hidden under all the damp leaves: nature may win a few battles, but persistence (and a good weather app) usually wins the war.

So, for now, I’ll sip my coffee, watch the rain mock my to-do list, and wait for Thursday. When the sun returns, I’ll be ready—leaf vacuum charged, gloves on, and playlist queued. Because if the weather’s going to conspire against me, I might as well make it a stylish defeat.

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Fitness Tracking is the Key to making progress

Written September 19, 2025

Hello Dear Readers,

This morning, Nashville reminded me that fall is creeping in. The temperature dipped into the low 60s—not quite “frost on the ground” cold, but just enough to make shorts questionable. I’m not one of those people who run in January wearing only a T-shirt and a look of eternal optimism. So, instead of heading straight out, I did the sensible thing: stalled. A few chores here, a sip of coffee there—by the time I laced up, the sun had climbed, and shorts were back in the game.

That small delay turned into a winning strategy. My first kilometer felt like I was channeling a younger, speedier version of myself. The air was crisp, the breeze perfect. For a glorious stretch, I felt unstoppable. Unfortunately, my app doesn’t track first-kilometer records (unless I upgrade to the paid version, of course), but I know it was fast—maybe the fastest yet.

Reality caught up soon enough, though. That lightning pace wasn’t sustainable, and by mid-run I had to ease back. Still, I beat my target pace overall. Not my best run ever, but definitely a solid win. And really, running isn’t always about shattering records—it’s about stacking small victories until the big ones happen.

Why I Started Tracking Workouts

That “stacking victories” idea is exactly why I’ve started tracking my workouts more deliberately. For the longest time, I tried to keep push-up numbers in my head, but memory failed me. Did I do 35 last week? Or was it 40? I couldn’t say. So I started writing it down.

At first, I tracked only push-ups, but soon expanded to planks, squats, and other pre-breakfast exercises. Suddenly, I had real data—a log of what I actually did, not what I thought I did. And here’s the surprising part: seeing the numbers on paper gave me more motivation than any pep talk ever could.

Strategy Is Nothing Without Tracking

It turns out strategy isn’t just about making a plan—it’s about knowing whether that plan works. Without tracking, you’re just guessing. With tracking, you see patterns. You see progress. You even see what’s not working, so you can adjust.

I’ve learned this partly by watching my wife, who has been a data queen for years. She tracks everything—steps, calories, workout times—and then tweaks her plan based on the results. It’s like having a coach who happens to live in your own spreadsheet.

The Motivation in Numbers

The real magic is this: data turns every workout into a challenge against yourself. If I did 40 push-ups last week, then I want 41 this week. If I ran a 6:00 pace yesterday, I want 5:55 today. Numbers don’t lie, and they quietly dare you to be better.

So no, I didn’t break my all-time running record this morning. But I beat yesterday’s pace, and I logged it. And tomorrow, I’ll try to beat today’s numbers. That’s progress you can measure—and motivation you can’t argue with.

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Cookies, Cold Runs, and Cat Chaos: A Fall Running in Nashville

Written September 15, 2025

Hello Dear Readers,

This morning, I decided to ignore my usual “cold-weather running schedule” and hit the road first thing. Why? Because thanks to my brain stroke, my autonomic nervous system is about as reliable as Nashville weather—completely indecisive. I have to change my running times seasonally: summer evenings, winter mornings. Today, I gambled with the cooler air.

Of course, fuel was required. Sadly, I was out of my trusty pastry bites, so I settled for one of my homemade bite-sized cookies. Sure, vegetables would’ve been the “healthier carb choice,” but when you’re staring down 5k with zero fuel, kale isn’t going to cut it. My wife won’t touch cookies before noon—she’s convinced sugar is a morning villain—but I like my cookies tiny enough that even my calorie counter barely blinks.

After the run, I realized lawn mowing season is officially over (victory dance). But before I get too cozy, the trees in our front yard have declared war—sending down waves of crunchy leaves that need collecting before they stage a full-on rebellion. Tomorrow, leaf duty begins.

Meanwhile, our kitten has been inhaling food like she’s training for an eating contest. Four servings down before lunch, and she still looks at me like Oliver Twist asking for more. At least she balances it out with exercise—her version of “cardio” is chasing a toy mouse across the living room like a furry missile.

So: no mowing, yes to leaf wrangling, cookies for fuel, and a kitten with bottomless-pit energy. Autumn in Nashville may be confused, but my day certainly isn’t.